DIABETES IS A CHOICE AND I CHOOSE TO SAY NO

I've been watching a series of documentaries this week called iThrive.  It's about the pandemic of diabetes that is currently happening in our world and what can be done about it.  It features all the experts that I trust and follow as well as a few that I find shady and a couple that I find truly misleading.  There was literally nothing in this that I hadn't heard before but I DON'T mean that as a criticism of this series and I DO recommend watching it if you get a chance, especially if you aren't aware that diabetes is a choice and can be reversed most of the time.  The doctors who treat diabetes 2 patients with a WFPB, SOS free diet improve their numbers and reduce medication every time and completely reverse it most of the time if the patient is totally compliant.  
(*WFPB - whole-food, plant-based; SOS no salt, oil or refined  sugars)

It's always hard for me to hear the data on diabetes because, in my mind, it is pretty much criminal how many people are left to suffer and die horrible deaths from diabetes when it is completely reversible if caught early, can be greatly improved if not reversed at any time and it is affecting millions more people every year.  It is one of the leading causes of death in this country and many others.  And, while it used to be a disease of the elderly and pretty rare when I was a kid in the 60s and 70s, it is as common as dirt now and rapidly becoming a disease that affects little children far too often.  But mostly, it hurts to watch a series like this one because I watched my sweet Mama become blind, crippled with neuropathy, go on dialysis for the last 14 years of her life (unusual really for someone to last as long as she did after going on dialysis) and eventually die at the age of 68 looking and feeling more like 98 from this terrible disease.

Mama was a nurse and a very determined woman who had overcome alcohol addiction, given up cigarettes cold turkey after 30 years of a pack and a half a day, went back to college at 48 after her first heart attack and graduated Magna Cum Laude even though her previous education only consisted of completing 8th grade and vocational school.  This is a woman who followed her doctors' orders.  If she had been told that changing to a diet of mostly fruits and veggies could reverse her diabetes, I promise you she would have done it.  She actually loved vegetables and grew a huge garden when we had enough space.  She would eat an onion just like an apple and snacked on the raw veggies as she was chopping them up for dinner. And I'm telling you, the woman could have happily lived on potatoes.  She could have been a STAR McDougaller.  Unfortunately, she was also a Southern woman who learned to cook in Texas.  She was chopping those veggies to smother them in butter and/or cheese and to be a side dish to a big slab of meat.  EVERYTHING was either deep fat fried or smothered in sauce, cheese or butter.  She could make scratch biscuits and sausage gravy in her sleep.

Diabetes is definitely one of the things I always "knew" I would end up with.  It is rampant in our family.  My brother David is suffering with it now.  One of the people in the documentary, sorry I can't remember who it was, said that you can't save the people closest to you and boy is that true and SO frustrating!  My brother won't listen to me.  He is one of the tough guy, "we all gotta die sometime" types who would rather enjoy his food than good health.  And that is exactly how it is!  Diabetes is a choice most all of the time.  (Please note that I am only speaking of type 2 diabetes.  Type 1 can also be improved with this lifestyle but isn't AS reversible as type 2 and the causes of type 1 are not as clear.)  It is incomprehensible to me that anyone would literally choose certain foods over good health once the information is made available to them and I tend to think they just aren't allowing themselves to believe it so that they can justify to themselves continuing with that behavior. Plus, they don't seem to acknowledge that they are not only choosing an earlier death but also suffering a great deal more while they live.  But that is a whole 'nother blog.  I'm getting off on a tangent, which I definitely tend to do when the subject of diabetes is raised.   Anyway... I always knew that I would end up with diabetes.  After all, I was told over and over that I had the genes for it and because I was obese, I was at even higher risk for it.  Doctors told me numerous times that I was "showing signs" of being pre-diabetic and were amazed with each of my 5 pregnancies that I did not test positive for gestational diabetes since I was obese, genetically predisposed and had really large babies.  I spent my life feeling like a ticking time bomb.  But I now know that I never have to suffer my mom's fate.  I can choose differently.  Genes can be expressed or turned off with lifestyle and food choices.  My family history is not my fate.

So watching this series was hard for me.  But it was also really, really good for me.  It was another kick in the keester to get myself back on track.  I have been feeling more and more strongly that I need to do a juice fast, possibly interspersed with a bit of water fasting to get myself back on the path to weight loss and excellent health.  I have, as I have mentioned previously, gotten off track.  Fast food and processed food has once again begun to represent a large proportion of my intake.  And lately, I have even started giving in to cravings for totally non-compliant foods.  I've had actual binges with increasing regularity and I'm too ashamed to admit what my weight is up to at this point.  I'm not back to my heaviest and I'd like to keep it that way.  It's time.  NOW.  Today.  I haven't eaten anything yet today and I am ready to get this party started again.  Today is a blank slate waiting for me to write upon it.  I must choose to write "health" or "harm."  I remember how incredibly well I felt when I was 100% WFPB.  I remember how much energy I had.  I remember how clear my mind was.  I remember how great it felt to walk long distances or work out and feel my body responding like a body is supposed to!  I have to remember those things because they are not true today.  But TODAY I change that.  So thank you Jon (the fellow who made the iThrive documentaries) for a much needed reminder that I didn't "fix" my problems forever by eating right for a couple of years.  I have to give myself the highest possibility possible for excellent health and avoiding the darker side of my genes every single day.  I can still develop the heart disease, diabetes, and cancer that are lurking in my genes if I don't choose to disable those genes every single day.

REWARDS AND PUNISHMENT

One thing I have known for a long time on an intellectual level but that I recently felt slip into my working reality is that each time I feed myself, I am choosing whether to punish or reward myself.  I ate some donuts yesterday.  I haven't eaten donuts in years and they were in my home (VERY rare occurrence) and I thought, it's been years - literally years.  I can have a treat.  But was that a treat? NO!  It was a punishment!  I harmed myself!  You don't reward yourself by harming yourself.  I KNEW I was harming myself.  I know too much now to fall for the old, "just this once, I deserve a treat now and then" bullshit.  I DESERVE to lose this weight and feel vibrant, energetic and healthy.  I DESERVE to enjoy my life with little fear of heart disease, diabetes or other diseases causing me to lose my quality of life.  I DESERVE to give myself every opportunity to be around to see my amazing grandsons grow into amazing men, fall in love, become husbands and fathers if they choose to and to make the world a better place.  In the big picture, who the hell cares about the mouthfeel of a donut?!  But I ate the damn thing because I have slipped more and more over the last 2 years into addictive thinking.  I dwell on fears and worries, I obsess over food continually.  There is rarely an hour in the day when I am not thinking about what I could "get away with" eating.  I've redeveloped the habit of hitting a drive-through or buying something at the deli every time I go out!  "Well, at least it's just a bean burrito."  "Well, this horrible meal won't do as much harm if I don't eat anything else all day."  Bitch please!  I  have slipped backwards a lot more than I ever thought I could and it is time I acknowledged that fact.  It is also time I recognize and deal with the food addict aspect of my problems.  I honestly wish I could afford to enroll in Chef AJ's Ultimate Weight Loss program but she generously shares a lot of information and support for free so I'll be taking advantage of that.  I know from experience that I cope better if I jump straight into the deep end rather than inching in toe first so... this is me, jumping into the deep end again.  Today, smoothies and salads and veggie soup.  The plan is to do that until Friday or Saturday.  And then to juice fast or water fast throughout the rest of March.  I won't use budget as an excuse to quit.  If I can't afford produce to juice then I will simply water fast.  That is free.  This is the best way I know to reset my taste buds and get the addictive crap out of my system and reboot my enthusiasm for this lifestyle.  I will blog every morning to keep myself accountable.  Even if it is just a line or two, I'll post something.  Even if I have to say I screwed the pooch, I will post something.  Pass the noseplug, I'm jumping in.

TRUTH AND CONSEQUENCES

Lately, I have witnessed some bickering amongst people that I very much respect and admire who disagree about diet.  All of them believe in the power of juicing and plant-based food but some of them also still believe that meat and/or dairy are a healthy part of their diet.  It kind of seems that those who continue to eat meat and dairy end up feeling a bit on the defensive about it because so many juicers end up going vegetarian, vegan or even raw vegan.  Heck I get a bit defensive and snappish myself if I'm around too many vegan purists (ethical vegans) or paleo fanatics who try to tell everyone that their way is the only "right" way.  Anyone would.  Basically none of us has the right or responsibility to tell everyone else what path to choose.  We DO have a right to share what we *believe* to be the healthiest choice.  And, in fact, I believe that we have a responsibility to spread the word about the healing nature of plants because so few people in our world know or understand how tremendous this power is or how much it can change their lives.  I try very hard not to get caught up in defining the details of anyone's path but my own unless specifically asked because the important thing right now, in what is basically the early days of a very important movement, is to get people moving in the right direction and to be a fantastic living example of the power of WFPB eating.  However, and this is a BIG however, I also don't believe that pulling punches or telling people that it will all be okay in the end if they just make a few little changes (baby steps - if I never hear the term baby steps again it will be too soon) because it's a lie.  And people will make those little changes expecting big results and be disappointed and start believing and spreading it around to everyone who will listen that the whole WFPB lifestyle is a lie.  And this will happen very frequently because too often when people try to make small changes, they neglect to consider a few key things about human nature as well as the nature of food.  So here is me giving my opinion on this important issue for anyone that cares to know.  This is a blog.  My blog.  So I can say EXACTLY what I think about the subject without pulling any punches.  It doesn't mean I would be this tactless or blunt with everyone who is genuinely trying to implement positive change in their life.  That will be my only disclaimer for this article.  Read on only if you want my undiluted opinion.

I've been reading "The Pleasure Trap" by Douglas Lisle so what is rolling around in my noggin is colored by that, just so ya know;)  I'm very early on in the book but all the talk in the early chapters about the fundamental motivations of living things got me thinking about Paleo.  Now I have a daughter who believes in Paleo and a lot of friends who do as well so I'm not trying to paint them all as ignoramuses or anything, believe me.  But it just strikes me as a very trendy, "cool kids club" kind of notion.  We'll eat like our ancient ancestors ate.  Now I think looking at how our ancestors ate can definitely have great value and it's fascinating that they can examine the stomach contents of a kagillion year old corpse and tell us what his last meal was.  I think drawing conclusions about the healthiest diet for modern man from that is ludicrous.  Dr. Lisle talks a lot about the primary motivations of pretty much all animals being to "seek pleasure, avoid pain and conserve energy" so as to survive to propagate the species.  If you take a feral human who has not had any "socialization" whatsoever, what will his behavior reflect?  He is going to find food, comfort and safety and, if at all possible, sex.  So our topic today is the food no matter how interesting the others might be;)  With no artificial or refined sugars, salts oils etc to screw with his taste buds, what food is going to be his first choice?  I promise you, sharpening a stick and trying to kill a bear will not be top of his list.  Come on!  He is going for what is easiest to acquire and what tastes nicest, ie, sweet or savory.  Fruits, berries, nuts, seeds, etc.  And let's also consider that what the "paleo" diet consisted of would have been wildly different in every region of the world.  They would have eaten what was most plentiful, tasty and easy to acquire in their particular habitat.  Unfortunately, that pretty well describes what modern man does too.  And what, to our completely raped and tortured taste buds, tastes most savory and is easiest to acquire (so that we may conserve energy to seek pleasure?)  McDonalds.  We also use our limitless human ingenuity to make foods literally addictive in order to make a buck.   So now the unhealthy, easy target foods are also something akin to crack.  Yay.

Let me just say that I knew quite a few "Paleo" advocates who really seem to me to be following a whole, clean food diet with lots and lots of fresh freggies but they just eat meat and dairy as well but they make sure their source for their meat and dairy is more natural and "clean."  No factory farmed, processed, fast-food etc.  Kind of like Joel Salatin promotes.  Love that guy even if we aren't 100% on the same page.  His book, "Folks, This Just Ain't Normal" is very thought provoking and entertaining.  I got the audio book narrated by Joel himself and it is really a fun listen in addition to making you think.  Good combination.  My only advice to people on this version of paleo would be to at least try to keep the percentage of animal protein in your diet down to 20% or less as T. Colin Campbell revealed in his China Study that this was the threshold for promoting cancer growth.

Now, as for me and my own particular diet.... where does the rubber meet the road for Natshell?  Yes, I occasionally eat animal protein.  Usually it is fish or sea food.  That's my particular weakness.  I also occasionally add a BIT of feta cheese to a salad because my family loves it.  And once in a while, that is a good enough reason.  I also occasionally have a greek yogurt if I can't find any soy yogurt.  The sum total of these indulgences is maybe 5 or 6 times per MONTH.  And here is a key for me; these are *indulgences*.  I do not try to kid myself that they are a necessity or even a part of the solution for me health and weight-wise.  Some peope indulge in a bit of dark chocolate or (hello Joe Cross) ice cream or even a burger (ewwww) but me, I indulge in sushi or a boiled egg (from a local farmer only - NO factory farm crap for me.) I recognize it as a treat.  I enjoy it and then move on to my wfpb diet that IS the solution.  But these are very much occasional treats.  I've said it before and I'll say it again; if you are having something every week or multiple times per week, it isn't a treat it's a regular part of your diet.

Lately, when this subject comes up amongst those of us who are into juice fasting, I am likely to hear someone (or a few someones) say, "Well, I still eat burgers sometimes because Joe Cross said it's okay." I knew the first time I heard Joe say this that it would become a big, ugly snowball rolling downhill.  People LOVE to hear good news about their bad habits.  Joe says it's okay to eat a burger so nobody get between me and the nearest drive-thru!  Petal to the metal baby!  I LOVE Joe Cross with a deep purple passion.  He. Saved. My. Life.  I respect him for his foresight, wisdom, strength and pragmatism.  Do I think it's terrible that he has a burger or chocolate ice cream once in a while?  Heck no!  Do I wish he had kept it to himself?  OH YES!  Did your mama ever accuse you when you were a child of "If I give you an inch, you'll take a mile?"  I suspect Joe's burgers are fairly rare occurrences.  I also suspect (no solid proof but I'm pretty sure) that he also is human and puts his pants on one leg at a time just like you and me.  If he has them more than a couple times a month, he is not doing himself any favors long term. That's my honest opinion. I doubt they happen more often than that truthfully.  And I suspect that the quality of the meat on his burger isnt even from the same universe as the @#^% that McDonalds calls beef.  But Joe says burgers are "the good stuff" and suddenly ten thousand people put McDonald's right back on the menu.  And they may start with, "Well, we'll have it once a week."  And it just sort of schmerges right into 2 or 3 times a week and before you know it they are saying, "Hey, why isn't this working?!"

So, bottom line for me (and any time I talk about subjects like this you will see/hear me say that a lot because that is all I have a right to - *for me*) meat/dairy is not going to promote my health or help me get to a healthy weight.  Getting it OUT of my diet was the first thing in my life that got that ball truly rolling.  If I have it, I recognize it as a treat and move on.  If others ask me about my beliefs I tell them to get the meat and dairy out of their life if they want to see the big, dramatic changes I've experienced and if they want optimum health.

I really think that a lot of people who have experienced the incredible healing properties of juice fasting and wfpb diet really say the PC thing about meat/dairy out of a misguided attempt to attract more people to the lifestyle.  In some instances, I am sure it is more likely to attract people if you don't try to tell them to give up the things they love all at once.  I do understand that.  But there are millions of sources out there telling people that they can have it all.  That they can lose weight and be healthy without giving up any type of food.  It's the party line these days.  "Portion control, exercise your brains out and take a diet pill or supplement."  Have cheesecake and cheese burgers!  Just have chemically altered versions or wee little small servings and you too can starve your cells.  I just don't care to try to promote BS anymore.  I believe there are a LOT of people out there who can and would make huge, fundamental changes if they really understood the difference it would make for them.  The end of fear of so many diseases that most of us have come to think of as inevitable.  Weight coming off naturally and effortlessly and (SHOCK OF ALL SHOCKS) enjoying the foods that were put on this earth to sustain and heal us in their natural state.  Finding out how exquisitely fine tuned our taste buds are when they aren't assaulted hourly with chemical additives.  Finding out just how sweet and enjoyable a carrot is when you haven't deadened your tongue with high-fructose corn syrup every day.  Getting off the 15-medical-specialists-and-a-surgeon merry-go-round and forgetting how to find the local pharmacy.  A year ago I would have never believed I would have made the changes that I have.  But I did because Joe Cross and Phil Staples as well as Dr. Esselstyn and T. Colin Campbell made it clear to me just how much better my life could be if I did.  When we act as if our friends and family "could NEVER" make these changes, we are underestimating and insulting their intelligence.  Those who won't make those changes need to come to that decision with ALL the information, all the truth, not more palatable half-truths.

JUICE ON YA'LL!  WE GOT THIS!!!!

Wheelchair OR 5K... I think I'll RUN!

So let's review.  Last August, I was writing goodbye messages to my kids in my journal and challenging The Almighty to finish up anything he had for me to accomplish in this life because I was done.  I was in constant debilitating pain.  The doctors had long since let me know that there was nothing to be done to improve my lot, they could only treat the symptoms.  Since I clearly didn't have the "willpower" to lose weight and I wasn't a candidate for weight loss surgery due to my history of blood clots, I would just have to try to manage the symptoms and accept that I would be in a wheelchair soon.  There was talk of amputating my leg because of the damaged circulation from a massive blood clot 20 years ago.  My knee had been a mess since 1982 when I shattered the knee cap and it was now bone-on-bone with bone spurs and arthritis and scar tissue.  My right shoulder was also "permanently" compromised from multiple tears in the rotator cuff that they couldn't operate on so it also had scar tissue, bone spurs and arthritis.  I had undergone physical therapy which helped a lot.  I was able to effectively use my right arm again at least.  Couldn't do overhead tasks with it and it caused me a great deal of pain but it was at least functional.  The stated goal of the PT with my shoulder and knee were to give me enough mobility to perform basic personal tasks on my own.  Like dressing myself and going to the bathroom. 
I also had ruptured discs in my back twice and had others that were deteriorating.  I was told I had "degenerative disc disease."  And then, in early 2013 came Paget's.  The pain in my back started becoming really unbearable over the 2012 holidays and I was afraid I had or was about to rupture another disc.  It turns out I actually had developed a disease called Paget's disease of the bone.  It was causing the bones in my pelvis and hip to become very soft and the combination of that with my severe obesity (I was about 320 at that point) was causing remodeling (deformities) in the bones.  It caused excrutiating pain to even have to sit upright in a kitchen chair or the seat of a car.  Walking was...  torture.  I had become effective house bound.  Rarely left my bedroom.
I had other medical issues; autoimmune disorders - Hashimoto's thyroiditis, myasthenia gravis, fibromyalgia - high blood pressure, irritable bowel.  Needless to say I took a number of perscription pills each day.  In July of 2013 I was a serious mess and had also started having symptoms of congestive heart failure.  I hid this and avoided my doctor as I had made the decision that I wasn't going to seek treatment.  That I was, in fact, going to stop taking ALL the pills and let nature take it's course.  I figured a stroke from the blood pressure would put me out of my, and everyone else's, misery quickly enough.
On August 17th, I was watching movies on Netflix and a movie came up in my "recommended for you" section called Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and the rest is history!  That was a Saturday.  Thursdays were my husbands paydays so on the 22nd I cleared out every single thing in my house that couldn't be juiced and stocked up.  I started my juice fast on August 23rd, 2013.  I consider that my "rebirth-day."  I don't live in pain anymore.  I swim and walk for exercise and have no issues with sitting, standing, walking, getting up and down off my knees, squatting.  But I haven't run yet.  I haven't run on land in over 25 years, maybe closer to 30.  I used to jog in the water, which I'm sure looked pretty crazy, because I didn't want my body to lose the muscle memory of HOW to run.  
So yesterday I was on Facebook and my oldest daughter, Bonni, posted that she had set up a team for the Tulsa Glow Run.  If anyone wanted to join her, it would be on August 23rd.  It took about a nanosecond for me to say, "I'll do it."  WHAT?!?!?!  Nine months ago I could walk across my yard without my son or husband to lean on! Even when I was active in my teens and twenties, I was into horses and swimming.  Never ran a race in my life! Was I crazy?!  Well, maybe so.  But just watch me run, baby.  I have 100 days to train.  I will be doing the Couch To 5K program 3 days a week and swimming 2-3 days.  
JUICE ON YA'LL!  I GOT THIS!!

Exciting Plans for March

So, February is over and I'm glad to see it go.  The weather is gradually getting better and better although there are still way too few sunny days for my taste.  We are supposed to get ice and frigid temps for Sunday and Monday but then it is supposed to warm up to normal temps for this area and time of year.  So with the majority of the really cold stuff behind us, I am confident enough to go ahead and start another juice fast.  I'm juicing at least through March and maybe part or all of April.  I'm calling this my March Juicing Madness!
I reached my second 10% goal in February so that was a huge victory that put me at 275.5 and I actually got down to 273.  But overall February weight loss was quite slow.  I believe that it is probably normal for our bodies to hold onto the weight tighter when we are exposed to frequent subzero temps as a safety mechanism and I was definitely exposed.  Not as in, "Baby It's Cold Outside" so I'll stay in my house where it's nice and warm.  Oh no!  I'm talking cold as in my house is a pile of crap and you can't keep it warm.  Cannot.  I have been freezing my assets off this winter.  But I just feel in my bones that my body is ready to start letting it go again so as a kick start, I'm back on Da Juice!  I have my brain in juicing gear so that I'm not even looking at or thinking about the chewed stuff.  That is the hard-to-describe difference between wanting to do a juice fast and having it just not take off like I did earlier this winter and a juice fast that is working for me.  I'm in the zone baby.  
I'm really pumped because the 10% goal I'm working on right now is to go from 275.5 to 248.  Making 248 will put me just 8 pounds away from having lost 100lbs.  So I've been hoping that I could hit 248 by the end of March but now I'm thinking that I will go on into April however far it takes to actually hit 100lbs gone.  I'm really going to hit 100lbs gone!  Like within the next few weeks!  How exciting is that?!
I made a youtube vid about my March plans that I've also posted here on my blog and I am getting ready to upload one about willpower.  I said I didn't believe in willpower and a friend said she was curious about that and I should make a vid so I did:)  It'll be up shortly.  I don't usually feel like I really articulate what I'm trying to say in these videos which is frustrating for me as public speaking is another one of those things that I used to be good at:/  But it is a personal challenge I've set for myself.  It's almost therapeutic.  
So that's where I'm at for March.  I'm planning to weigh in on Fridays so I'll at least post progress blogs on Friday or Saturday of each week.
JUICE ON! WE GOT THIS!!!

February Plans and Some Reflection On My Weight History

So after a VERY depressing Superbowl and yummy and healthy but overly plentiful game day snacks, I am ready to get this ball rolling again.  I was planning to just flatout juice fast through the month.  But since the weatherman has revised our 2 week fore cast to stay below freezing the entire time with lows in the teens and single digits, I'm not sure I can face how cold I feel on just juice.  My house only stays about 50degrees when it's this cold and I have no hot water now (long story) so I have to heat up water in an electric pot to clean my juicer and jars.  We will be out of here by the end of the month but, of course, it will probably start to warm up by then.  And I've spent too many years waiting for the perfect conditions to do what I need to do.  So I WILL juice in February in spite of all the challenges I face.  But I will probably also have a bowl of veggie soup now and then when the cold gets to me.

I'm predicting that my weight will start with a 2 and a 6 by the end of the month.  Oh, I'm 278 today. I haven't seen a 260-something in about 8 years.  Maybe 10?  I know I got down into the 240s in 2000 when we lived near Grand Lake which was the lowest I'd been in many years at that point. I hadn't been below 220 since the 1980s.  And I hit the 260s I believe within a year or two of moving away from Grand Lake.  I know I was battling to get out of the 280s from '05 if not longer.  So even being in the 270s is a huge victory. For nearly 2 years I fought hard to lose the weight and get healthy but I didn't realize yet that the food I was eating was making that impossible.  When the doctor sent me to physical therapy in Spring '09, I had been fighting the 280s for a while already.  I found renewed hope in the progress I made with my physical therapist and started really trying to "eat right" according to conventional wisdom and I was working out like a BEAST.  When the PT maxed out on my insurance, she told me I should start swimming.  So I did.  I joined the Y and went swimming 3-5 times a week and was going upstairs and working out on the machines for 30 minutes 3-5 times a week as well.  In spite of all that work, I never got below 280.  I got in good enough shape to go to work again which was awesome.  Started doing cell-phone tech support.  I fought my way through the MG flareups and the increasing pain in my back, hips and legs.  In February of 2012, my truck broke down and I walked the mile and a half to work when I couldn't find a ride.  The walk home was all uphill and was killer on my pain areas.  I could only take that for so long and had to quit my job.  I was having more and more MG flareups and the pain in my back and hips was getting unbearable.  There were times I couldn't stand in the mornings until pain relievers took effect.  Those times became more and more frequent until that was my everyday condition.  In early 2013, I had already been diagnosed with high blood pressure and hypothyroid and was on medications for those.   The doctor convinced me to go back on blood thinners to postpone the amputation of my bad leg as long as possible.  I was giving up.  I figured I had hit my wall and my good years were past.  When I was diagnosed with Paget's and told that the combination of the location of the bone disease and my weight, which by this time was about 320, the bones in my pelvis and hips were becoming deformed, I was trying hard to accept that a wheelchair was in my near future.  That was about a year ago.  I put on another 20 pounds to top out just over 340, became seriously depressed and just gave up on life.  Last summer, I had become so weak and in such constant pain that I rarely left my bedroom.  I began having symptoms of congestive heart failure.  That's when I decided to stop fighting and just die.
So that brings us up to where I started this blog.  I saw "Fat Sick and Nearly Dead" and "Forks Over Knives" and decided to live.  And in 5 months, I've undone the damage from the last 5 years of rapid decline, gotten off of all medications.  And I have absolutely no doubt whatsoever that the next year will undo more like 20 years worth of damage.
I turn 52 a week from tomorrow and I will hit that day feeling better than I have in years.  And I'll hit 53 feeling better than I have in decades.  I was planning to do another progress picture on my birthday in my new jeans just because it felt so amazing to be able to wear jeans again but... my new jeans are already too big!!  Maybe some size 20 jeans will be my birthday gift to myself;o)  I started out in a 28 so that isn't too shabby.  But I won't buy any if I can't find them discounted because I know I won't be able to wear them for long.  Now that is my kinda dilemma.
JUICE ON!!  PLANT-STRONG FOREVER!

January Juice and Chew Day 9

Day 9
4 pints juice
3 tangerines
1 banana
1 boiled egg
1 large baked potato with Mrs. Dash

I'm a little overwhelmed by my non-food related life today so I'm going to leave it at that for today.
JUICE ON!!  Everything is better with juice!  Even all the sh** the world throws at you.

JANUARY JUICE AND CHEW DAY 8 Or The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men...

So, not juice fast day 2 and not day 1 again.  I'm postponing my hardcore juice fast for a week or two.  Hubby isn't snowed in anymore but his truck broke down so now they have him put up in a motel in Indiana while he waits his turn for the shop to fix his truck.  Around 200 other guys are waiting for the same thing.  Some new fuel they have made him use in the truck gels up when it gets too cold.  Yup, trucks broke down all over the North half of the country.  Him not moving for a week means my grocery budget will be VERY tight.  Also, when the pipes thawed out, there was a burst pipe in the bathroom.  Long story but it won't be fixed for at least a few days so we have the water to the house shut off.  Not shut-off valve in the bathroom - retarded right?  See why I'm moving?  So clean up will be challenging this week too.  So we'll just go ahead and do what I've already been doing since the 1st.  It's cool.  I'm feeling very zen about it.  The facebook group I LOVE,  Reach4Raw, is doing a 90 day juice and chew challenge so I'm just travelling along with my rawfriends there:)  I'm eating healthy, drinking juice and losing weight so it's all good.

J&C Day 8
Weigh in - 281.8
3 pints juice
3 tangerines
1 LARGE salad with greens, tomatos, mushrooms, green onions, cucumber, sprinkle of sunflower seeds and light balsamic.
I did a 20 minute Sparkpeople resistance band video and discovered that my right leg is still very much weaker than the left.  It wasn't as bad after I finished physical therapy but over the last 3 years being so horrible health wise, it has gotten really weak again.  (I had a massive blood clot in that leg that damaged the veins and also the right knee is the one that is trashed.)  So I have a goal now to rehab my right leg.  I finished the video but was not able to do all reps on the right leg and my form sucked!  So room for improvement:)

On a personal note, I was really excited when Kitten the Juice Pirate joined my group on rebootwithjoe.  She is SUCH a huge inspiration for me and one of the first examples of what you could do with this lifestyle.  I posted on Reach4Raw about this and got lots of great responses but I was so touched I can't even tell you when my friend Taffy said that I was her Kitten the Juice Pirate.  That I was to her what Kitten was to me.  Wow.  I am floored.  The day before, I posted my progress picture and had a few people say that seeing that gave them the inspiration to get on with it and start juicing and eating raw!  Me!!  Inspiring people!!!  On top of all the really stressful stuff that was going on I have to confess I shed a tear or two.  But we'll just say that was emotional detox and keep that between you and me okay?

JUICE ON!!

Winter 2014 Juice Fast Day 1

First off, I have to start by saying my heart goes out to those affected by this insane cold front that has blanketed the nation.  Many areas are getting down in the 30 below area!!  Here in Oklahoma it was in the single digits most of the time for the last two days.  Windchill last time I checked yesterday during the day was around negative 12 degrees.  My main source of heat is out so we have portable electric radiator style heaters.  They do all right when it is in the 20s or 30s but single digits are too much for them.  It was 35deg in my house when I went to bed last night.  It is supposed to get up in the 40s and 50s for the rest of the foreseeable forecast so we're fine here.  But so much of the country is just frozen. My husband is snowed in at a truck stop in Gary, Indiana.  And this cold is apparently hard on heating systems because my daughter and several friends have reported their heat going out.  However, my main thoughts and prayers at a time like this are for the homeless.  The shelters are just woefully inadequate, at least around here.  I feel bad because I didn't take any hats and scarves to the shelters this year at all.  The last couple of winters have been so mild it sort of fell off my radar.  So my knitting challenge for the duration of my juice fast is going to switch to just making as many hats as I can, both adult and infant, as well as scarves and glittens.  If they report another cold front headed for us, I'll take them to John 3:16 shelter.  If not, I'll send them to the reservation.  (To make the time pass faster during my juice fast, I'm knitting for charity.  When I set myself a knitting deadline, the time always flies by.)

Now, my report for Monday.  I have to report on the previous day, obviously, since I can't know for certain what all I will do today!  So, weight will be current mornings weight.  Food will be from the previous day.  Got that?  So tomorrow will read "Day 1 - Again"

MONDAY, 6 Jan 2014
Weigh in: 282.3
Juice: 3 pints
Liquids: 16oz water, 16oz broth from cabbage soup with pepper
Food: 1 banana, 3 tangerines, 1 baked potato with salsa

Detox symptoms: Yes!  My eyes are all gummy and I have a headache and some nausea.  Someone just asked me yesterday if I experienced nausea last time and I said, "No, not really."  And then in the wee hours of this morning, bam.  Nothing too unbearable, but not all that pleasant either.  I also feel pretty upbeat and cheerful from some fool reason.  But I do feel like the glitches on the reboot website are maybe more than I can handle right now without ripping someone's head off so I'll wait a while to log in.

And, by the way, it is up to 40 degrees inside my house!  Whoopee!  I am planning to also include any workouts I get in on these posts but I didn't do any yesterday.  Maybe today or tomorrow at the latest it will be warm enough for me to take off some layers (ha! I typed lawyers at first - I'll take off some lawyers) and work out with my resistance band:)

Stay warm everyone.  And pray for those who can't.

Welcome 2014!

This is the first time I can ever remember being happy on New Years.  Usually New Years, like my birthday, is an occasion for me to try very very hard not to fall into a terrible depression; or at least to not let it show to my family.  People talking about their New Year's resolutions just reminded me that I had let yet another year go by without doing anything to change the dismal direction of my life.  Thank God for Joe Cross and his movie Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and for all the other wise and wonderful people and resources that it led me to.  Dr. T Colin Campbell and Dr. Esselstyn among others.  Today I can honestly post this on facebook and mean it!  (As I, in fact, did;o)

That pretty much sums up how I feel about New Years.  I lost 54 lbs during the last 18 weeks of 2013.  And I have every expectation that I will lose double that during 2014.  That will put me at the weight I graduated high school in 1980.  I don't know what my final ideal weight will be but I know that will be an unbelievable victory and that I will be in radiant good health.  I have reclaimed my dreams and plans.  I think of 2013 as the year I came back to life.  If you read my blog, you know that this is not hyperbole.  Now here is how I think of 2014:

I am not one for big, involved New Year's resolutions but I have made some plans for the new year.  I eat a clean, healthy diet but I am still growing and learning in this lifestyle.  I am not fully raw, just high raw and I am not even 100% vegan.  For now, this is cool with me.  Maybe I'll "evolve" beyond this and maybe I won't.  But I really do feel a need to both track my food for my own benefit and to be accountable.  So I plan to start posting here daily instead of randomly.  I may frequently only post what I ate and what specific exercises I did but there will be something every day unless my computer or ISP goes down.  I'll also post my weight every Friday.  And everyone has been after me to do progress photos since I've lost over 50lbs now but trust me, since I started at 340, 50lbs isn't a dramatic change to the naked eye.  But I'll do them. I'll try to do them and post them tomorrow.  And I will post progress pics every 50 bs or every 4 months, whichever comes first or seems to make more sense at the time.

And, for the record, I am starting another juice fast Friday.  I will go to the store tomorrow for supplies and start juice only the next day.  I am committing to 30 days of nothing but juice. Period.  After the 30 days, I'll decide on a weekly basis.  I'm hoping to go 90 days.  I may end up having a one day a week salad and I will be having a special, healthy, vegan meal at a great restaurant for my birthday on February 11th but hopefully I can do 90 days other than those exceptions.  I have no problem with making up my own rules about my juice fast as I have nothing to prove to myself this time.  I am just pushing for as much health and weight loss as I can possible get in the next three months.  I have things to do and horses to ride come this summer so we got to get this party started!!  

Hopefully, my third long juice fast will be late this summer when I have a garden of my own to harvest and I'll be juicing as fresh and organic as it gets.  Yeah babay!  JUICE ON my friends!  2014 is Going. To. ROCK!!

Three Types of People You Meet in Juicing Communities

I have watched all the youtube videos and read all the blogs I could find by and about people who lose weight juice fasting and/or a whole food/plant-based diet/high raw diet etc. Yes. A lot of people do regain the weight but the ones who have the courage to come back and tell you what went on will tell you exactly why. (Check out Steve Crider's latest videos STEVE CRIDER YOUTUBE CHANNEL- love that guy because he is honest and never gives up!) They regained the weight because they went back to eating whatever they used to eat that made them fat in the first place.  If you do what you've always done, you will end up where you've always been. I read and watched and researched and read some more.  I saw that many people regain the weight with juicing and WFPB diets just as they do with WW, Atkins, South Beach and Weight-loss surgery.  I took all that in and used it to motivate me to really research and plan so that when I was finished with my first actual juice fast, I would have a solid plan in place for what I was going to eat for the rest of my life to continue to lose weight and eventually maintain a healthy weight, feel great, live an active and joyful life and love my food all at the same time. And I have. I NEVER would have believed that I would love eating like this and I sure as heck never thought I would LOVE eating like this. I grew up a country girl. We raised our own beef, chickens, and pork. I showed livestock in the shows and went hunting with my dad. Vegans and vegetarians were extremist nutcases. (Note - Personally, I still think PETA is nuttier than fruitcake.) Well, call me nutty because I am now very near vegan and I LOVE what I eat every single day. And my two teenagers have gone along for the ride and are losing weight as well and they love the food too! And my 19 year old was one of those kids who never touched a veggie other than a tomato or canned corn EVER before we started this. (No! I'm NOT counting french fries.  That is a fat, not a veggie, in  my book.)

Here's the thing. I really believe there are three types of people around juice fasting communities. Those who think they want this, try it and, within days or maybe a couple of weeks at most, decide it is too hard. Even though detox has been explained to them, they may become certain that juice is making them sick.  They drop out and are never heard from again.  Then there are those who throw themselves into it and white knuckle their way through a nice long juice only fast while counting the days til they can once again hit the Burger King drive through or pat themselves on the back for having more veggies on their pizza than they used to. They lose a ton of weight and then promptly gain it all back. It is absolutely true and can't be repeated often enough; If you do what you've always done, you end up where you've always been. One hundred percent accurate!  Funny how that works:/  

Then there are those who use the time on juice fast to allow the process to fundamentally change them. If you are one of these people, you come to realize that this doesn't just change what you are doing for a few days or weeks or even months; it changes everything. It is physical, mental and emotional. You discover things about yourself that you didn't know before including inner reserves of strength. You educate yourself. You discover that your weight gain had nothing to do with lack of willpower and that you've been duped by a huge industry into becoming addicted to things that harm you in order to make them richer. You get pissed and You. Change. Everything. And you love it! Free of all the salt and sugar and chemicals, your taste buds come back to life! You rediscover that the foods given us by our creator actually are wonderful to the taste without all the chemicals and that foods that aren't over-processed and overcooked and genetically modified taste better and sustain our bodies the way they were intended to be. You relearn what healthy feels like. You rediscover having energy to burn.  You realize the miraculous thing that the human body really is!  It begins to heal itself!  I have a number of friends who have gotten off of blood pressure medication just as I have and off of asthma meds and acid reflux meds like my daughter has and even off of INSULIN!  The body can and will heal and regenerate itself if you flood it with all the nutrients it needs.

I'm NOT saying everyone has to give up meat or dairy or gluten as I did. But it is certainly wise to very cautiously add those substances back in and pay attention to the effect on your body.  Most of the ones I know who are still losing or maintaining after a long period of time have definitely made whole-food/plant based foods the center of their diet. And I literally do not know one who has maintained while still eating a processed, junk-food based diet. I really, really recommend you check out Dan Miller's web page here: DAN MILLER WEB PAGE  or go to DAN MILLER JUICING & PLANT-BASED FOOD  and look over his discussion thread there.  I'm in there as Natshell:) Dan has been at this a long time and has more knowledge and information available on this topic (not to mention succes at losing and maintaining for a long period) than anyone else I know of and he is great at answering questions.

I assume most people who find my blog have already watched Fat Sick and Nearly Dead but if you haven't, do so!  I also strongly recommend anyone who hasn't already, please watch Forks Over Knives. If you are a reader, read The China Study, The Pleasure Trap, Wheat Belly and Clean. Check out youtube videos and websites by Dr. McDougall, Dr Fuhrman, Dr Esselstyn and Rip Esselstyn, Douglas Lisle and Robert Lustig. Let one discovery lead to another. Make it your business and your top priority to discover what food/long-term diet will best serve your weight and your health once you aren't juice fasting anymore. Shouldn't your health and well-being be a top priority?  Lots of people do regain weight after juice fasting. But YOU don't have to be one of them. 

Guest Blogger Reynolds - Surely Juice fasting isn't (gasp) ever difficult!?

Hello Ladies and Germs, it appears to me that contrary to all previous articulated notions to the contrary, doing a juice fast can, for some, in certain specific circumstances, be just a tinge on the difficult side.

Who would have thought? Let's see.... ceasing to chew food after decades of that thrice daily ritual ... ingesting liquids that look like your grandpa in South Louisiana just dipped a pitcher into the swamp to conduct mosquito larvae experiments... giving up our favorite foods of Snickers and Cornflakes on rye and cold Chef-Boyardee ravioli with apricot and dark chocolate pieces... living in a world where inundation from food sellers is more difficult than winning the lottery three times in one week... being ridiculed, criticized and called crazy by our FRIENDS!!! ... having removed from our listening pleasure the melodic sound of freshly produced cellophane wrappers crackling in our fat little fingers... having that little invisible monkey that piggybacks around with you screeching that he is hungry at the top of his lungs ... and the icing on the cake, so to speak, having to wash the dog in the backyard as your sadistic neighbor grills burgers and bacon every night. Then you realized that you've bathed the dog in the back yard four times this week already.

This is a big head game, this juice fasting. It is an exercise in distraction, illumination, redirection, denial and wistfully hoping.

It is all about dealing with THIS hour. Whatever it takes is what it takes. Taking a walk, cleaning the bathroom, calling your mother, vacuuming the car, weeding the roses, reading a book, watching Fat Sick and Nearly Dead again. Whatever it takes. The big thing is you have to believe that rebooting is beneficial and worth the sacrifices. Has stepping on the scale and seeing a smaller number show up, does that spin your top? How about knowing that you just began the process of expelling decades of stored toxins in your body, likely extending your life and making your remaining years healthier? If none of that works, then get creative. Try following a squirrel into a tree and do the squirrel bark at him until he looks mad enough to jump on you. Get creative!

Just please, please........... don't go eat 19 twinkees and a bag of Oreos and expect to feel good tomorrow, or feel good about yourself. It is not gonna happen. We are rooting you on gal. We've walked that walk. It is all about THIS HOUR. So just win this hour. Whatever it takes.

- See more at: http://community.rebootwithjoe.com/discussions/topic/100-lbs-or-more-starting-a-9113-30-day-reboot?p=135#sthash.Ys8JReho.dpuf

Guest Blogger - Reynolds

I am a member of the fantastic community of juice nuts at rebootwithjoe.com based on Joe Cross and his experiences as seen on "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead."  My friend Reynolds is the guy that everyone in our group turns to for wisdom and inspiration.  He is in the middle of this same journey that I am on and, like me, feels that nothing in this world is going to offer the things that juice fasting can.  Another friend on the group had had a pretty significant slip-up on day 6 of her first juice fast and wondered if she should just give up and "pig out for a few days" or jump right back into juice fasting or maybe just try to transition onto a healthy "diet" instead of juice fasting.  She got tons of great advice and support but Reynolds words really hit home for many of us.  I asked him if I could post his reply here and he agreed so here it is.  Someone out there needs to hear this.  I just have this feeling.

Heathie: I read your post then went offline to compose a thoughtful response. When I came back to post, Katie had posted her very sage advice gleaned from numerous reboots over the last 6 months where she trimmed over 100 pounds from her frame. My words are very similar to hers, I'm just more long-winded. But the common points on which we both touch, we hope resonate with you. Here is mine:

ROFL..... Heathie your number three, "pig out a few days and then start back?" had me splitting my side. You probably don't get it but Natalie, Katie and Jana do for sure.

You are likely saying, "but I wasn't trying to be funny." Exactly! You were asking the SAME question every Fattie asks themselves when they get a mouthful of mud... "so do I just go back to being who I was for all those years?" Every single one of us in this forum have had huge doubts when we stumbled and we asked that same question.

Here is the whole enchilada wrapped up in a long thought :

All fat people got that way for a reason, maybe three. Once fat, we had family, friends and society send us mixed messages about our rising weight. At some point we became obese, and while we learned a host of excuses to push back anyone who cautioned or criticized us, we never managed to get around to accepting responsibility for STAYING fat. It is one thing to get fat over our teenage and young adult years, but it is another thing to keep gaining in our twenties, thirties and forties. Jana, Natslie, Katie and I are all near or above 50. Sure, we'd tried to lose weight every year or two. But we never found a way to get it off and keep it off. Until we ran into Joe Cross and juice fasting.

Heathie, what happens on a JF is a fundamental change in the mind. It doesn't come with most any other weight reduction plan. During a prolonged JF the mind is allowed, yes even forced, to put some distance between food and ourselves. Not having reason to be so intimate with chewed foods for a period of time allows us to reduce, and even remove, the emotional bonds that exist between EVERY Fattie and food. Finally, the stranglehold food has had on us is broken, literally, for the first time. It is not a permanent break up, necessarily, and yes that is the challenge of every Fattie that has gone through an extended JF must deal with.

I can't tell you how many days you have to be on a JF (10-45?) before the brain makes the switch and the mind sees things like it has NEVER seen them before. That change has as many looks as there are people doing a JF. But most JFers come to the realization that they have been lied to by the commercial food companies, but worse they've been egregiously lying to themselves as well.

During the JF the combination of detoxing, losing lots of weight and stepping back some distance from food synergizes together to give the person a birdseye view of food, addiction, compulsion, cravings and binging. I guess it is akin to seeing a ghost or Bigfoot. -- you might later question what you saw, but at the time you were unmistaken in what you saw. It is that pronounced of an awakening. The trick is to live out what we know. But we have 10-20-30 years of bad habits and only days/weeks/months at having a deep appreciation of vegetables and juicing.

So it is hard at first to win every single fight with our compulsive/addictive self. We'll lose once a day, then once every third day, then once every week, until finally ... finally the body relents and goes along with what the mind has been saying! Then, the struggle is cut to a fraction and the person is "over the hump." Will he or she struggle occasionally? Most certainly. But the struggle isn't at 10:42am, 2:39pm, 6:05pm, 8:47pm -- it is once every week or so.

The addiction is broken, but no immunity is created or a magic shield thrown up around the person. The lust of the eye is still there. The difference is that the new mind sees food differently. It no longer is a surrogate lover as it was. Now it is something to use as needed to meet a basic nutritional need. Sure, enjoying food is fine, but seeking pleasure from food no longer controls your every chewing decision. Most critical for the typical JFer out living in the chewing world again is the ability to master perceptions of food and thereby strictly controlling what goes in the body. There is no longer a free-for-all where just anything goes. We cant kid ourselves anymore. When eating again, every meal is a considered decision. Do want me to say that again? Every meal is a considered decision.

So why this loooong post? Well, what I'm telling you is this, it is so US. So fattie, to flop off the horse and then say, "oh what the hell, I think I'll just go eat a pan of peach cobbler." That is what fatties do routinely.

But in the near future, maybe within only a week or two, you too will recoil from the thought of going and pigging out with every stumble. Soon, you'll want to flee from pig outs as you will see them for what they are -- compulsive , uncontrolled bouts of mania. Yep, as part of JFing the mind changes its perceptions and with the changed perceptions comes a changed behavior. But! It is possible to slide back into the abyss, so vigilance is required for a long time, usually for more than a year.

Have you ever talked with someone that has climbed a massive peak like Kilimanjaro or Denali? Invariably they will mention that besides being staggeringly difficult dealing with all the adversities, it was a very specific system to summit and return to base camp safe. Freelancing was tantamount to death. The many that had gone before had spelled out all the problems and obstacles threatening each climber. While only thousands had done it before, nevertheless all the perils, risks, pitfalls and dilemmas any climber could face were very well articulated and defined by previous climbers writing about their experience.

So it is with a JF. There are no new wrinkles to be discovered by a new JFer. The struggles are all well known and written about here and in many blogs. It is important to know that what each of us are going through on our JF, is completely commonplace. It is predictable! Really!

Oh, not everyone has the exact same issues of headaches and diarrhea, or like. But your weaknesses, cravings, panics, listlessness and other symptoms experienced in your JF are the same ones the rest of us have experienced. Promise! So you see where I'm going with this -- learn from climbers that have summitted and come down to tell about it. Don't think for an instant that you , or me, or Natalie, or Katie, or Jana or Danielle -- can beat the established path that has been blazed ahead of us. We simply can't do it. Knowing the regimen and then sticking to it is imperative. We just aren't smart enough to find a new, better route up the mountain. Stick to the known, proven routes. Going rogue has bad consequences.

So what! You fell off the horse! You did it. Now that is history. Are you going to live in that momentary failure or instead jump back on the horse and ride. I hope you choose the latter, and choose it immediately.

Heathie, you have inside you a champion. But you'll have to find that champion. Usually the champion doesn't show up in the first couple of days as that time is so full of confusion, angst and flailing about.

But she will show up if you stay on the horse. But, before she does, it seems like you are about to expire. The body throws a fit, and then capitulates finally in day 4, 5 or 6. This gets lots easier. We are sure rooting for you and want you to ride with us on our journey to get healthy and lose weight. We hereby grant you a full absolution of your face plant! Now c'mon, go with us. You can only fail if you quit. So don't quit! :)

- See more at: http://community.rebootwithjoe.com/discussions/topic/100-lbs-or-more-starting-a-9113-30-day-reboot?p=83#sthash.AEETWGPg.dpuf