But But But... Tough Love

Nota Bene: if you don't like reading long blogs, cut to the last paragraph. That's the long and the short of it.

Okay, lets start by getting the provisos out of the way.  First, I am addressing people like me.  People who are morbidly obese with multiple serious health problems that are connected to that obesity and have decided to address the problem with a whole food/plant based diet.  Many of us watched Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and also incorporate juicing into our quest for healthy bodies.
Second, I am NOT addressing people who truly, literally do not have control over their own environment.  It's not all that common and you need to really look at whether or not that is true and not just a cop-out.  But if you really are not in control of your home environment then stop reading or understand that I'm not really speaking to you.  Work environment is much more commonly out of our control but not nearly as critical either.

Another group I really can't address in this post is a large one.  In my interactions with people seeking better health and/or weight loss, I see many, many more come and go than those who stay. Most people just aren't ready.  They just haven't hit their own, personal, rock bottom yet.  When it becomes uncomfortable they make a beeline for the mac and cheese muttering, "I can do it with portion control and working out like Jillian Michaels.  I don't need no stinkin' vegetables."  Cuz, that has worked out so well for them in the past:/   Heaven knows there is plenty of propaganda out there to feed their desire to choose an "easier" path or to even just continue on the one that is killing them.  Everyone likes to hear good news about their bad choices so when the media spouts off crap about how we really have to eat dead animals or how chocolate is a health food, it's easy to grab onto that. Anyway, that's another soapbox entirely.

Right now, I want to address people like me.  You're obese and unhealthy and truly committed to changing that.  You have come to believe that a WFPB lifestyle is the best medicine out there.  You are making changes and seeing progress.... and this is where SO  many insert a "but."

But... it's the holidays.
But... my family is visiting.
But... my girlfriend doesn't want to give up chips and ranch dip so it's there in the cabinet taunting me.
But... I still need to fix cookies for my kids or I'm a bad mom.
But... my husband deserves fried chicken because he works so hard.
But... I have to go out to dinner with clients a lot.
But... nobody wants to see a veggie tray at the party.

When people who are just as sick and fat as I am/was say things like this, I want to ask them just how important this is to them.  For me, it was literally life or death.  If you've read my early blogs you know I don't exaggerate.  So many people describe situations just as dire, nearly as dire or even more dire than mine was and then turn around and say, "Oh I have to fry chicken and bake cookies."

I believe we need to look at two things when we find ourselves letting these "buts" interfere with our best intentions.  First, how important is this to ME and second, how important am I to the people around me.  How much can I reasonably expect from those nearest and dearest to me.  Here is where I start to sound harsh but bear with me.  I know that I am lucky.  Blessed actually.  I didn't know how my family would handle it but, to be honest, my family is a matriarchy.  My hubby is a truck driver and I'm a bossy, independent type chick so it works for us. In other words, I worried I would meet opposition but I.  Didn't. Care.  Once I knew that I had finally found the answer, I knew that I would follow through with it whether they liked it or not.  I have kids from 17-32 and I wanted to influence them but I can't control them so I figured I would do what I had to do for me, require of them what I needed and leave their own bodies to them.  I have been absolutely astounded how readily my family has not only embraced and supported my needs but followed my example.  I have not exactly been a shining example to them in the physical/health department so they had every reason to shrug this off as "Mom's latest attempt" but they recognized something in the way I talked about it and in the evidence I presented and they have been on board 100% from day 1.  I have NOT, however, been all that surprised that they had no problem with all the junk food and processed foods going bye-bye.  If I told them I had developed a deadly allergy to cotton that was leaching away my health and energy, they would be right in there helping me find all the hidden cotton in our house.  Because they love me!  I would have expected nothing less.  If you can't depend on your family to support you in your own fight for your very life, then what is wrong with that picture?!

So what if your family isn't on board?  Get tough! It's your health people!  In many cases it is how long you will be around for them and it is definitely how you will feel and function during that time.  Sit them down and watch Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and, even better, Forks Over Knives.  Tell them that you want to look better, feel better and be around to annoy them in your old age!  Say flat out, if you love and value ME, you will support me.

I don't want this to be too long for anyone to get through so I'll cut this part short.  If you have grownups who don't have the issues you have, look at two things.  Do they actually need or benefit from the foods that were making you fat and sick?  Does it really make you a bad mom/wife to refuse to prepare foods that contribute to diabetes, obesity, cancer, heart disease?  So Susie isn't overweight? Yet?  Most of us were thin at some point.  The groundwork was laid while we appeared to be healthy.  If they are healthy and fit, let's keep them that way!  And if the hubby really has to have something like fried chicken or chips and dip, they are adults, they can go through the drive through.  Same goes for adult children.  They have to decide for themselves.  But they should have enough concern and respect for you to support your effort to create a clean, healthy environment.

Here is my bottom line.  Yes, I realize it sounds pretty harsh.  If your family will not support your need to eliminate junk food and food that trashes your health from your home, then you have some deeper problems than weight.

And my other bottom line (hey, who says there is only one bottom line?) is that no matter how thin or fit your family appears to you, if you have discovered that certain foods are deadly, why would you continue to feed them to your family?  If you've come to understand that a high consumption of sugar, animal protien, saturated fats... whatever, creates terrible health problems over time, then tell me again why you are a bad mom if you don't give it to your kids?  You don't have to make the change completely overnight but I can't understand why you wouldn't start transitioning them to healthier and healthier foods.  That is what my daughter is doing with her boys.  I'll let ya'll know how that goes;o)  But, trust me, you aren't a "bad mom" if you refuse to feed a diet laden with sugar and salt and animal fat to your growing children.  Frankly, if the children are dictating what goes on the dinner table then we have a case of the inmates running the asylum.

Now about all those other "buts," if you have to eat out with clients, is it really going to make them lose respect for you in your professional capacity to eat a salad instead of a steak?  To leave the butter and cheese and bacon off of your baked potato?  If others at the party don't want a veggie tray... okay!  More freggies for you!!  And more of the junk they are scarfing for them.  If your family is visiting, visit some vegan chef websites and find some really impressive recipes to show them just how tasty your diet can be.  Sure, go ahead and fix PopPops favorite casserole but offer a couple of really yummy things they've never tried before with it!  It gives you some healthy options and shows them that you aren't starving yourself on rabbit food;o)

I really want to add one last note to those who have somewhat dysfunctional families.  You know who you are.  You read this and think, "Yeah, try telling my husband that.  He would start bringing home Kentucky Fried Chicken and eating it right in front of me while taunting me the entire time."   "Try telling my mom that this is healthy.  She is just as overweight as me but she would start bringing my favorite fattening treats over every weekend and telling my kids that I don't love her because I won't eat her thoughtful gifts."  Yes, some families are dysfunctional.  If these things are a problem, you probably know you have other issues besides food to deal with.  You, my friends have to advocate for yourself.  You have to love you.  You have to realize that a healthy you can work on your families dysfunction better if you are in a healthy body.  Especially since WFPB diets also make you think better and feel emotionally and mentally stronger.

Okay so THIS is actually my bottom line. (Yes, really! Why do you doubt me? LOL) Do what you need to do to get healthier. You count. YOU matter. Advocate for yourself, even with your own family, employers, clients. Unless you have some pretty extraordinary circumstances, clean up your environment. Your family won't die from lack of deep fat fried food. Require those who love you to show it. Become fierce about your own well-being. I know many people (myself included) who have spent November and December losing an extra 10 or 20 lbs while the average american gains 8 or 10. For the first time in many years, January 1st will be a time to celebrate all I've accomplished and plan for all I will accomplish in 2014. My only regret is that I didn't start way sooner in the year! I don't for one second regret skipping the pumpkin pie or sugar cookies.  And I don't regret refusing to contribute to the poor health choices of others either.

There Are No Magic Bullets, But There Are Miracles

Every time I find myself describing my journey to someone new, I realize just how much I sound like an infomercial or like I'm just caught up in the pink fluffy honeymoon cloud of a "new diet" but I've never in my life stuck to a diet for this long much less been in the "honeymoon" phase of it for several months and going strong.  This has most definitely settled into lifestyle mode.  

 So that begs the question, how can a simple change of diet create the incredible changes I've experienced.  Well, lets look at a few things.  First, getting the disgusting mess the local grocer passes off as meat and animal products that I was eating - hormones, puss in the milk etc - out of my body.  Just removing those has to help. If I had changed to homegrown, grass fed, lean cuts and healthy prep and still ate the meat, I would be better off but still not as good as just getting the animal protein out of my diet. (If you aren't following me here, read the China Study and/or watch Forks Over Knives.)  I'm 90% animal protein free.  I still eat a serving of fish 2 or 3 times a month, have a bit of organic chicken or turkey in the crockpot soup once or twice a month and I have an organic, cage-free, hormone free, preferably locally grown boiled egg a couple times a week.  I don't know if I will eventually eliminate those or not.  Even the China Study noted that the cancer growth and other bad effects weren't triggered with a low intake of animal protein.  So I'm good with this for now.  

 Next, let's note that my diet went from very near zero fresh fruit and veggies to a good 75% freggies.  That alone had to be a huge shock (of the good variety) to my system.  At this point, every system and cell in my body has to be singing for joy.  It's like, "Halleleujah! She's finally giving us something to work with!"  
Now let's add the fact that I juice and blend a lot of freggies and add really nutrient dense, natural additives like ground flax etc.  Now you are taking the great nutrients that your average healthy eater would consume in a day and putting all those nutrients into one serving.  You are literally just FLOODING your system with nutrients it's been deprived of for decades.  

 Our bodies are amazing self-healing machines but we take a machine that has the ability to repair itself and even regenerate on its own but we deny it the building blocks it require to do that.  And then we wonder why we fall apart.  So what do we do?  Instead of handing it those high-quality, sound and solid building blocks that God gave us in abundance, we give it man made imitations made of cardboard and chemicals.  And then we wonder why we fall apart!

 One last thing to consider that really just makes our body sing is that even when I was eating a salad or drinking juice before, it was made and packaged and stored and shipped and stored again before I ate it.  If I had ever gotten ground flax in something, it had probably lost most of it's nutritional value before it got to me.  Now, I grind my flax seeds, throw that into the soup or smoothie and consume it.  No nutrional loss there.  Again, tons more nutrients hitting my body than it is used to.  And next year is really going to take it up a notch as I will be able to just go to my own garden and pick the veggies as fresh as fresh gets:)

 So if I sound like a crazy infomercial sometimes; if it sounds crazy to say that I went from depressed, barely able to walk across a room, in constant pain and a mental fog every day of my life and then literally became pain free, regained my energy, improved health conditions dramatically, started losing weight at a steady pace and regained a much higher degree of mental clarity all within days of starting a juice fast and now I'm still feeling fantastic just as much after 4 months of a clean, plant-based diet, you can understand that I'm not promoting the latest fad or a magic bullet or even a "diet."  I'm just saying to eat the way God meant you to.  Eat the abundance of things he gave us to thrive on.  If that includes meat for you then at least make that a smaller ratio of your calories and make it fresh, untainted by a disgusting industry and prepare it in a healthy way.  
 It's not a miracle... and yet it is the biggest miracle of all.  How miraculous that those plants include all those crazy nutrients that really can heal, regrow, vitalize and maximize the potential of every cell in your body.  The things your doctor throws his hands in the air over and just writes another script for?  Your creator gave you the cure.  When the few doctors who have actually studied the topic of healing through nutrition say, "Sure, a plant based diet would help my patients but they won't follow it so I just give them a pill instead."  You can shout, "I'll do it!  I'll heal myself with nutrition!"  Maybe more doctors will seek out that information and share it with their other patients if they have patients coming in with dramatic improvements and telling them, "I don't need those pills, doc.  I stopped taking those months ago."  I am praying that by the time my grandkids are grown, they will defy all those predictions about the newest generation of children dying younger than their parents did. 

BRRRRR and Some Embarrassing Truths About My Life

So here in Oklahoma, winter is making up for how mild it was the last couple of years by icing on us and leaving us in the single digits.  I'm freezing and pissy.  I HATE ICE!!!  I don't mind snow, I kinda like it.  And when it's cold outside, it can make you appreciate your warm house and your fuzzy slippers (or in my case, hand-knit wool socks) even more, right?  Yeah right!!  We are doing good to keep it over 40 degrees in this place. My house is old.  Really old and falling apart.  They found problems with the gas pipes so they won't allow the gas on.  Some nonsense about the danger of explosions or fumes... whatever.  (Yes, for those who might not understand me yet, I'm being sarcastic.)  So we have no hot water and only space heaters.  We are supposed to be moved out by the end of the month but it may realistically be January something.  We rent, by the way.  The windows and doors are so poorly installed that you can literally pass things through to someone outside around the edges.  Seriously, we've done it.  The sliding glass doors have about a 3 inch gap on one side because they don't fit the opening!  We've filled that with foam but it still lets in air. There are holes that you can throw a cat through, as the old saying goes.  Although nobody better be throwing my kitties anywhere;o)  I know the holes are that big because possums keep sneaking into my house.  Yes, literally.
Totally off subject but I have to tell this story now, since I mentioned the possums.  They live under our house.  I'm cool with that.  Well, this one is so comfortable living with us that he likes to stroll through in the night.  We would usually just yell at him or the dog would bark or a cat would hiss and he would take off back out the hole.  (It's not a hole I can get to - the landlord made the holes last year trying to fix the gas problem.)  Possum wasn't aggressive, in fact he was quite shy and nervous so we just ignored the problem.  I grew up in the country; critters don't bother me.  My cousins had a pet raccoon for years. Well a couple weeks ago, Cameron woke up and the possum was strolling across his body on his bed as he slept!!!  He screamed like a little girl and the dog came running and started barking and the chase was on.  Well, possum realized he had screwed up big time (even though he was considerably bigger than the dog) so he did what possums do.... he played possum.  He had made it to my room by this  time.  So Gadget dragged what he presumed to be his "kill" behind my love seat.  Possum still playing dead.  Cameron moved the love seat, put a bucket over it, took it outside and THREW it across the yard.  Still playing dead!  He came in the house and we watched out the window.  About two minutes later, he gets up and casually strolls back under our house.  Yup, it's like that around here.
I've mentioned that I had given up on life until last August when I watched Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead.  Well, I'm admitting to all of this so you can understand just how low I had sunk.  We were living in a house that should have been condemned.  We can only plug use one appliance at a time in the kitchen other than the frig.  Throwing a breaker is a very regular occurrence.  Basically if you turn on the toaster without unplugging the juicer, bam.  This neighborhood isn't great either.  Oh and my beloved old truck (I LOVE old trucks - especially Fords; I would rather push an old truck than drive a new car) has been neglected and left in need of repairs for over a year.  I had to have someone to help me in and out if I went anywhere anyway and I couldn't do my own shopping anymore as I couldn't walk unassisted and was too proud to use an electric cart.  So what did it matter if I had my own transportation.  My poor family could do nothing to pull me out of this downward spiral.  It was actually quite telling that I was even willing to live in town.  I have always hated living in town.  I need to be in the country surrounded by nature and critters and air.  I feel trapped and claustrophobic in town and it sets off my PTSD something fierce.
So this really does relate to all my healthy life changes.   I hated myself so much that I didn't care how I lived.  I don't now.  Juicing and WFPB eating has not only given me back health, energy, weight-loss and independence (which is so important to me I can't even express it here - I am independent to a fault by nature) it has also given me back my self-respect and my desire to live the life I choose.  We are getting out of this rat trap.  We are looking for land to buy out in the country.  We are going to buy a large RV to stay in while we pay off the land because once you have 50% equity in your land, there are a couple of companies that will either put a double wide on it or  build a prefab home on it for no down payment.  Your land serves as your collateral.  The RV will also allow me to do another thing that I've always yearned to do and never been able to - travel.  And buddy, let me tell you... we are going somewhere warmer for the winter.  We should have the RV by the end of January at the latest - probably a 32' 5th wheel, haven't decided for sure.  Getting the truck fixed by the end of the month as well - that's my Christmas present.  I have friends in South Texas I'd like to see as well as a sister in Arizona and brothers and tons of cousins in California.  I am most definitely going somewhere warmer for at least a good chunck of this miserable, cold, icy winter that Oklahoma apparently has planned.  I love Oklahoma but I HATE ICE!!  (See how I brought that back around.  I really did have a point!)
Oh and lest you think I'm too off topic on this post, let me just say that as long as I have to literally bundle up in several layers including hat and scarf and mittens inside my house, I will probably not be losing as much weight because I'm not drinking cold juice and eating cold salad today.  If I can see my breath in my bedroom, I'm having hot lentil soup and warm broth and baked potato with salsa and oatmeal and anything else that is served nice and hot!  Don't get me wrong, still plant-based and clean but not much raw.  And I have really come to believe in the power of raw.  I'm not getting involved in all the drama going on in the raw community these days but I do believe that eating as much raw, fresh foods as you can manage will always benefit you.  Except when it's 8 degrees fahrenheit outside and you only have a space heater.
Oh and as to my weight, I have lost a bit more.  I'm down to 293 which means I've lost 47 lbs since August 23.  I'm really curious to see how much the weight loss slows with these changes or if it will surprise me and keep going at 2-3 lbs a week.  Stay tuned!

The Real Thanksgiving

So for those of us trying to live a healthier life and lose weight and regain vibrant health, Thanksgiving can represent a challenge.  I must have been asked at least 85 times in the past week how I would "handle" it and even asked for advice about how best to handle it for others.  That's new.  I still haven't gotten used to having other people act as if my opinion on topics of health and weight loss really matters.  LOL  Everyone really has to decide for themselves.  Some people have complicated family situations to consider and I would never presume to get in the middle of that!  But, as usual, my real, deep down feeling is that family should value your health and well-being enough to make some concessions or even (gasp) just support what you are trying to do.  I can't imagine not having a family that supports me like that.  And that is probably what I'm thankful for this year most of all.  My husband is one in a million.  He supports me through all things.  He epitomizes "in sickness and in health" and "for better or for worse."  My kids and grandkids bless every day of my life and don't hesitate to do anything in their power to support my efforts.  So how did I "handle" the challenge of Thanksgiving?  

​I have had a great Thanksgiving with my two teenagers.  I am so proud of them.  I told them that if not having pie or rolls or something was going to make them feel deprived or like this lifestyle was too hard, I would get them some.  They both said NO!  And Harmoni (17 year old) said, "The main thing I'm most thankful for this year is how happy you are just living every day now." My hubby is on the road but we are used to that.  We have a nice meal when he gets home and we don't celebrate Christmas until Epiphany so that he can be home.  I told my grown kids that since Thanksgiving meal was going to be turned on it's ear that they should probably just spend it with their inlaws.  I hope to be so used to this lifestyle by next year that I will make them a feast to remember that I won't hesitate to eat as well.  I'll be spending some time with my oldest daughter and that new baby boy next week and I'm definitely thankful for that!  I'm really thankful that all three of my grown kids have found really amazing and wonderful people to share their lives with.  Both son-in-laws and my daughter-in-law are really awesome.  I honestly couldn't have chosen better for them myself.  I have NINE beautiful, healthy, intelligent grandchildren.  God has blessed me beyond measure.

Thanksgiving was really my Mom's holiday as she was an amazing cook in the old-school Southern cooking style.  I see her in my daughter Cheyenne.  I always miss her so much on this day but part of me is glad she isn't here to see what terrible condition I have let myself get into.  At least I have felt that way every Thanksgiving until this one.  I know that she would be so proud of the changes I've made, the things I've learned and the rest of the family for their unwavering support.  A few weeks ago when people first started talking about Thanksgiving, my first thought was, "Oh no! Mom's stuffing and apple pan dowdy and heavenly hash!"  Fixing her recipes always made us all feel closer to her.  We knew that she was there with us in spirit.  Well, the day came and we ate our small serving of roast turkey and roasted veggies and lots of fruit.  We even had a special treat that Cameron brought us; gluten free, dairy free cookies!  I do NOT feel like I missed a thing.  Rather, I feel more thankful and more blessed than I have in many years.  And that, my friends, is what Thanksgiving is about, not turkey or pie or cornbread dressing.  

Keep It On the Evens - Another one from Reynolds:)

The trick is to match up the numbers and always be on even numbers. Huh? Yes, stay on even numbers. Let me illustrate:

On Monday Suzie saw a chocolate drizzled croissant in the bakery window, and dove teeth first through the glass and ate it quite merrily. She even licked her fingers with delight after the croissant was vaporized. Bur her fall from the horse was quite noisy and caused a commotion that all the other croissant eaters harrumphed at with upturned noses. They thought she was so uncouth. That is one.

But in the afternoon, Suzie, now profiting from a moment of reflection as she bandaged the cuts on her face and hands inflicted by the bakery case glass, thought hard.

Strengthened by the experience, she stood up and raised her bandaged fist into the air and resolved to not let this episode of taking the scenic route that day, spoil her juice fasting completely. So little juice faster, brushed back her floppy Eeyore ears, and smiled big and said to herself, "Alright I learned from that. Now I'm getting back on that horse again and ride. I can do this." And she did. That is two.

For many weeks our brave little juice faster would quaff many a jar of green goody-ness. And the pounds just rolled off her plump forehead. Occasionally, however, she would succumb to the Siren voices beckoning her, and she would stumble again. But she always, always got back on the horse.

So, the moral of this story is, for a Fattie to stumble and fall is One. But getting back up and jumping on the juice is Two. Keep it on the even numbers and no matter how many times you fall, and then have to get up, you'll still be moving toward your goal. And they all juiced happily ever after.

Reynolds

- See more at: http://community.rebootwithjoe.com/groups/view/code/FVL79KLDPEF3SC57JJ6C?p=64#sthash.U22NojwB.dpuf

Three Types of People You Meet in Juicing Communities

I have watched all the youtube videos and read all the blogs I could find by and about people who lose weight juice fasting and/or a whole food/plant-based diet/high raw diet etc. Yes. A lot of people do regain the weight but the ones who have the courage to come back and tell you what went on will tell you exactly why. (Check out Steve Crider's latest videos STEVE CRIDER YOUTUBE CHANNEL- love that guy because he is honest and never gives up!) They regained the weight because they went back to eating whatever they used to eat that made them fat in the first place.  If you do what you've always done, you will end up where you've always been. I read and watched and researched and read some more.  I saw that many people regain the weight with juicing and WFPB diets just as they do with WW, Atkins, South Beach and Weight-loss surgery.  I took all that in and used it to motivate me to really research and plan so that when I was finished with my first actual juice fast, I would have a solid plan in place for what I was going to eat for the rest of my life to continue to lose weight and eventually maintain a healthy weight, feel great, live an active and joyful life and love my food all at the same time. And I have. I NEVER would have believed that I would love eating like this and I sure as heck never thought I would LOVE eating like this. I grew up a country girl. We raised our own beef, chickens, and pork. I showed livestock in the shows and went hunting with my dad. Vegans and vegetarians were extremist nutcases. (Note - Personally, I still think PETA is nuttier than fruitcake.) Well, call me nutty because I am now very near vegan and I LOVE what I eat every single day. And my two teenagers have gone along for the ride and are losing weight as well and they love the food too! And my 19 year old was one of those kids who never touched a veggie other than a tomato or canned corn EVER before we started this. (No! I'm NOT counting french fries.  That is a fat, not a veggie, in  my book.)

Here's the thing. I really believe there are three types of people around juice fasting communities. Those who think they want this, try it and, within days or maybe a couple of weeks at most, decide it is too hard. Even though detox has been explained to them, they may become certain that juice is making them sick.  They drop out and are never heard from again.  Then there are those who throw themselves into it and white knuckle their way through a nice long juice only fast while counting the days til they can once again hit the Burger King drive through or pat themselves on the back for having more veggies on their pizza than they used to. They lose a ton of weight and then promptly gain it all back. It is absolutely true and can't be repeated often enough; If you do what you've always done, you end up where you've always been. One hundred percent accurate!  Funny how that works:/  

Then there are those who use the time on juice fast to allow the process to fundamentally change them. If you are one of these people, you come to realize that this doesn't just change what you are doing for a few days or weeks or even months; it changes everything. It is physical, mental and emotional. You discover things about yourself that you didn't know before including inner reserves of strength. You educate yourself. You discover that your weight gain had nothing to do with lack of willpower and that you've been duped by a huge industry into becoming addicted to things that harm you in order to make them richer. You get pissed and You. Change. Everything. And you love it! Free of all the salt and sugar and chemicals, your taste buds come back to life! You rediscover that the foods given us by our creator actually are wonderful to the taste without all the chemicals and that foods that aren't over-processed and overcooked and genetically modified taste better and sustain our bodies the way they were intended to be. You relearn what healthy feels like. You rediscover having energy to burn.  You realize the miraculous thing that the human body really is!  It begins to heal itself!  I have a number of friends who have gotten off of blood pressure medication just as I have and off of asthma meds and acid reflux meds like my daughter has and even off of INSULIN!  The body can and will heal and regenerate itself if you flood it with all the nutrients it needs.

I'm NOT saying everyone has to give up meat or dairy or gluten as I did. But it is certainly wise to very cautiously add those substances back in and pay attention to the effect on your body.  Most of the ones I know who are still losing or maintaining after a long period of time have definitely made whole-food/plant based foods the center of their diet. And I literally do not know one who has maintained while still eating a processed, junk-food based diet. I really, really recommend you check out Dan Miller's web page here: DAN MILLER WEB PAGE  or go to DAN MILLER JUICING & PLANT-BASED FOOD  and look over his discussion thread there.  I'm in there as Natshell:) Dan has been at this a long time and has more knowledge and information available on this topic (not to mention succes at losing and maintaining for a long period) than anyone else I know of and he is great at answering questions.

I assume most people who find my blog have already watched Fat Sick and Nearly Dead but if you haven't, do so!  I also strongly recommend anyone who hasn't already, please watch Forks Over Knives. If you are a reader, read The China Study, The Pleasure Trap, Wheat Belly and Clean. Check out youtube videos and websites by Dr. McDougall, Dr Fuhrman, Dr Esselstyn and Rip Esselstyn, Douglas Lisle and Robert Lustig. Let one discovery lead to another. Make it your business and your top priority to discover what food/long-term diet will best serve your weight and your health once you aren't juice fasting anymore. Shouldn't your health and well-being be a top priority?  Lots of people do regain weight after juice fasting. But YOU don't have to be one of them. 

The Gluten Summit - SOOO much information!

I read Wheat Belly several months before I saw FS&ND. I started trying to eliminate gluten - keyword there is trying:/ While under the influence of a toxic diet, trying to eliminate foods that are addictive in nature is HARD!  Once I got on my juicefast, of course, gluten was automatically eliminated. Along with sugar and dairy and added fats. LOL That is why coming off of juice fast is the ultimate perfect time to carefully and individually add things like that back in to see what causes a bad reaction. For me it was all of the above but especially the gluten. Dairy makes me nauseous and bloated but gluten is literally debilitating. VERY quickly.  Sugar just triggers food cravings and makes me think I'm hungry all the time.  

This week, I have been watching tons of video presentations of The Gluten Summit. It makes me really sad that the vids are only available for 24 hours because there is WAY more information than I can really assimilate and share in that short time period. I can't afford the DVDs unfortunately.  But one good outcome is that both my youngest girls have decided to eliminate gluten too. Harmoni was feeling yucky after a sandwich and said, "Mom, I wonder...." And she hasn't had any gluten anything since then, about 6 days ago. When we weighed in Friday, Gini was excited because she has lost 47 lbs but she said, "It is a little frustrating because I'm not losing this (pointing at her belly) as fast as I hoped." I said, "Get off the wheat." She said ok and went and threw out the last bit of bread in the house! She was the only one eating it by then. LOL So I'm really curious to see what her waist measurement is in a week or two. We already knew she was lactose intolerant and I've learned at The Gluten Summit that the two OFTEN go hand in hand but people don't realize it. People will even try elimination diets and when eliminating the gluten or the dairy doesn't have as much effect as they were hoping they give up not realizing that they need to try a period of giving up both. So many people just don't want to face the idea of giving up something they "love." Whether it is relationships or people. They say, "But I love it/him/her!" Instead they should look at whether or not it is a healthy reciprocal relationship.  If it isn't serving you well, kick it to the curb and don't look back!!!

Guest Blogger Reynolds - Surely Juice fasting isn't (gasp) ever difficult!?

Hello Ladies and Germs, it appears to me that contrary to all previous articulated notions to the contrary, doing a juice fast can, for some, in certain specific circumstances, be just a tinge on the difficult side.

Who would have thought? Let's see.... ceasing to chew food after decades of that thrice daily ritual ... ingesting liquids that look like your grandpa in South Louisiana just dipped a pitcher into the swamp to conduct mosquito larvae experiments... giving up our favorite foods of Snickers and Cornflakes on rye and cold Chef-Boyardee ravioli with apricot and dark chocolate pieces... living in a world where inundation from food sellers is more difficult than winning the lottery three times in one week... being ridiculed, criticized and called crazy by our FRIENDS!!! ... having removed from our listening pleasure the melodic sound of freshly produced cellophane wrappers crackling in our fat little fingers... having that little invisible monkey that piggybacks around with you screeching that he is hungry at the top of his lungs ... and the icing on the cake, so to speak, having to wash the dog in the backyard as your sadistic neighbor grills burgers and bacon every night. Then you realized that you've bathed the dog in the back yard four times this week already.

This is a big head game, this juice fasting. It is an exercise in distraction, illumination, redirection, denial and wistfully hoping.

It is all about dealing with THIS hour. Whatever it takes is what it takes. Taking a walk, cleaning the bathroom, calling your mother, vacuuming the car, weeding the roses, reading a book, watching Fat Sick and Nearly Dead again. Whatever it takes. The big thing is you have to believe that rebooting is beneficial and worth the sacrifices. Has stepping on the scale and seeing a smaller number show up, does that spin your top? How about knowing that you just began the process of expelling decades of stored toxins in your body, likely extending your life and making your remaining years healthier? If none of that works, then get creative. Try following a squirrel into a tree and do the squirrel bark at him until he looks mad enough to jump on you. Get creative!

Just please, please........... don't go eat 19 twinkees and a bag of Oreos and expect to feel good tomorrow, or feel good about yourself. It is not gonna happen. We are rooting you on gal. We've walked that walk. It is all about THIS HOUR. So just win this hour. Whatever it takes.

- See more at: http://community.rebootwithjoe.com/discussions/topic/100-lbs-or-more-starting-a-9113-30-day-reboot?p=135#sthash.Ys8JReho.dpuf

Dear Doctor, Why?

I have spoken many times about all the medical issues I faced before starting my journey to self-healing and weight loss.  It was pretty grim.  Over the last few decades, I (and my insurance companies) have spent hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to make my life bearable.  In all those years, I found pretty much zero help or relief.  I just got progressively worse and worse.  The answer to many if not all the problems I was having was as simple as changing my grocery list.  Yes, I spend a little more on groceries now but, recall that "hundreds of thousands" I mentioned?  Not hyperbole folks. So there's expensive and then there's expeeensive.  And there is more than one sort of "cost."  Basically, what's it worth to you?  Expensive is a relative term  A $50k house is a bargain basement find!  But a $50k car is expensive!  What's the value of the thing is a a better question that what is the cost.  So to me, my new diet is not expensive.  For it's value, it is quite cheap.  How much do you spend on perscriptions?  What if your food was your food and your medicine?

First off, I find it laughable when people say to me that they can't afford all this "expensive" produce but it is actually a serious issue for many so let's talk about that for a moment.  I understand tight budgets.  No really, I do.  We have been on the nothing-but-ramen-noodles-all-week diet more than a few times.  I know from broke.  But most of the time in recent months, before becoming whole foods/plant based and juicing (WFPB from now on) we spent around $125-175 per month on food for the family.  We also ate out at least once, often two or three times every week.  It was our payday ritual.   We usually got pizza or Sonic or Arby's or Taco Bell.  Taco Bell and Little Caesars are cheap for those weeks we had a more limited food budget.  But that was an additional $15 to $60 per week or more.  And then let's add up all the stops at Quick Trip for soda and a "snack."  Am I the only one who would routinely spend $5 on #%$!* every time I filled up the gas tank of my car?  I think not.  So I was spending $150-200 per week on crap that was killing me.  Literally.  Literally crap and literally killing me.  Not to mention the money I was spending on medications I no longer need. Nowadays, I routinely spend $180 a week on food.  I haven't spent a solitary dime on fast food, packaged junk or convenience store snacks in 4 months.  Yup, that WFPB diet is just too expensive.  Still think it is too expensive?  Check out Ellen Jaffe Jones.  You can find her on facebook and youtube.  I am not sure if her website is working but she also wrote a book called Vegan on $4 a day.  And then there is this blog: http://homelessformyhealth.blogspot.com/.   Go read it.  Seriously.  AFTER reading that blog, you come tell me that a healthy diet is too expensive.

Now, on to the things that are really on my mind today.  A couple of things I have been hearing lately really have me pissed.   Both have to do with doctors.  First off, why the holy heck in all the years I've been to doctor after doctor, spent many weeks in hospitals and had dozens of very expensive tests done and been lectured about my weight continuously, has no doctor ever, once suggested that I had a leaky gut or gluten intolerance.  Never once has any of them suggested I try eliminating sugar or dairy.  Not ONE medical professional has ever suggested that people who eat primarily a plant based diet have little to no heart disease, cancer or diabetes.  You know why?  Because they know squat about nutrition.  Seriously.  They can't tell you what they don't know.  There is, of course,  the problem of  the bought and paid for research they are being fed by USDA, FDA and Big Pharma plus there is the absolute absence of any real education.  In medical school, our future physicians get a few hours of training in nutrition.  Hours.  NOT class hours or credit hours.  As in your history class counts as 4 credit hours.  No.  A few actual clock hours of their entire education.  Don't believe me? Check this out:

The approximate time devoted to nutrition science over the first two years of my medical education is a measly 6 hours....  James Haddad  [http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2011/12/nutrition-taught-medical-school.html]  After the first two years they are in actual medical settings as interns and residents.  With live patients.

Your doctor was not taught nutrition unless he went out on his own time and dollar and researched it himself.  Since doctors in training have all that.. ya know... spare time.  And since becoming a doctor, he is consistently fed the SAD conventional wisdom that is killing us all by degrees.  So when people ask me if my doctor is on board with me going WFPB and all the juicing, my response is, "I don't give a rat's tail."  My nutrition is up to me.  

The other thing that set me off was several instances of hearing that what few doctors actually got the memo that WFPB diets can prevent a host of diseases dropped the ball anyway.  Mostly.  There are those few voices in the wilderness but your average physician in your average town or city?  Well, the prevailing attitude seems to be that they don't bother recommending any radical change in diet because patients will likely find it too challenging and won't follow through.  Changing your way of eating is too hard.  Why bother when weight loss surgery is so much easier.  And heck, many insurance plans are starting to cover it now too!  Bonus!  (In case you missed it, insert heavy sarcasm there.)  So if even one doctor over the years looked at me and thought, "Damn woman!  All you need to do is make salad the main dish!  Throw out the cheese and the bread and eat some veggie stew instead."  he or she then decided that I couldn't possibly have the physical or mental fortitude to deal with such advice so they just scheduled the next MRI or bone scan, filled out another perscription and sent me home.  We are being treated like idiots and fools by the people we trust with our lives.  Weak idiots and fools.  Sure lots of people say, "Oh I couldn't do that!"  But the problem is that they don't really believe in it.  If our doctors were educated enough and committed enough to our health to really teach it to their patients, a LOT of them would say, "It will actually give me my health and energy back?! I can do that!"  Some wouldn't.  So for them, doctor, go ahead and schedule that next scan and write that next prescription.  Do what you can to prepare them for the fact that their lives will be shorter and more painful and miserable.  But at least learn what you need to know to give as many of us as possible a shot at real health.  I know the first rule is supposed to be "do no harm" but shouldn't that be closely followed by "do as much good as you possibly can?"  

11 WEEKS IN - An Update

It is pretty crazy to think that we only started this new lifestyle 11 weeks ago.  I haven't blogged as much lately because I tend to think I don't have anything interesting going on.  I'm just a mom and grandma dealing with day to day life just like anyone else.  I forget that certain things about our lifestyle nowadays are considered "non-norm."  I forget that it is not "normal" to find no meat and no dairy in the average kitchen.  I forget that not every mom hears their teenagers arguing over who took all the mushrooms in the salad.  "I want mushrooms too!"  LOL  The average home probably doesn't have 10 pints of beet/apple/carrot/ginger juice in the frig.  For about a minute; until the teenagers discover it.  Not every house on the block contains 3 ladies who have lost a combined total of 115 lbs in the last 3 months.  Is it normal for you to spend 90% of your grocery shopping time and money in the produce section?  I used to barely glance in there; maybe to grab some bananas for the grandkids or a bag of potatos.  Is the average families trash made up almost entirely of juice pulp and peelings?  Where are all the cans and boxes and plastic containers?

Here are the problems we have lately:
Honey, should we sell the microwave?
No!  I heat up my lemon/ginger water in there in the mornings!

I am NEVER going to finish my holiday knitting if I don't find some time to sit and knit!

Mom! We're out of celery!

I can't BELIEVE I was dumb enough to consume gluten again!  Gluten makes me ill!  What was I thinking?!!!

So life around here is just the same old boring routine as anyone elses.... With a few twists;o)  And the most beautiful part is that I am actually participating in that routine.  I'm not sitting in my room watching life go on without me.  Yes, I am still on the program.  Yes, I am still losing weight although it isn't beating any speed records.  I have broken through to the 200s again but since I hit 299 last week, I haven't lost any more.  The scale likes to screw with me  like that.   I'm not worried.  I am giving my body what it really needs and trusting it to do the rest.  Meanwhile, I feel fantastic!
A few things have changed.  I no longer have to mindfully create positive dialogue about my food. I don't have to say to myself, "Those foods are poison to me.  I am not the sort of person that eats whatever is easiest.  I nourish my body."  I don't have to mindfully say those things any more than I have to mindfully say, "I am a mom.  I am a wife."  They are just who I am.  And did I mention I feel fantastic?

Thanksgiving Plans

I have been asked by quite a few people how I'm going to handle Thanksgiving.  Thankfully, I have a very uncomplicated, supportive and understanding family so I am under no real pressure to fix or even attend a big, fattening, American fat fest on Thanksgiving. Why do we Americans take everything sacred, every beautiful occasion and turn it into something kind of vulgar and all about consumption. MORE presents, MORE booze, MORE food. (sigh) I'm kind of over it. I want to be with loved ones, eating something that make me feel great and watching some football. For that, I will be extremely thankful. LOL I realize that some people have much more complicated family expectations but for me, it is simple. No traditional meal or comfort food is worth losing what I've gained. I was literally crippled with my weight and with disease so no way am I giving that up for a pumpkin pie or even my mom's stuffing. My Mom has passed and her stuffing is a big tradition for us.  But I promise if you put in a call to Heaven and ask her, she will tell you that my good health and the amazing new habits I have cultivated are way more important to her than any food.  I don't need that stuffing to feel close to her.  I have looked up amazing, beautiful and yummy recipes that will not damage my body that I can celebrate with. All that being said, if you aren't as lucky as I am in this area, you have to decide what is best for you.  A lot of people are juicing right up to Tday and then just letting themselves completely off the hook for a couple of hours during that meal and then getting right back on juice fast. At least that is their plan. I suspect it will be a struggle for a lot of people. I also know quite a few who are going to go to the family gathering and have some nice lean turkey breast and a big helping of salad and some fruit and call it good. Everyone has to make their own decision. For someone who was as bad off as I was and then given a miracle, it is an easy decision. My friend Jana posted a pic the other day that pretty much says it for me. "Don't give up what you want MOST for what you want RIGHT NOW." Natalie Michaele

Thyroid Cure?

I just picked up a Woman's World magazine because there was an article in it about a book called "Hormone Cure" by Sara Gottfried, MD.  Thyroid medicine is one of the few perscriptions I'm still supposed to be taking.  I say supposed to be because I have chosen to stop taking all perscriptions to give my body a chance to do what good it can with all this terrific new nutrition I'm giving it.  In a few months, I'll get checked out and then see if there is anything the doctor thinks I need to go back to using.  And I'll think about it;o)  So anyway, my interest was piqued and I'm not a fan of reading a magazine in the checkout line and then putting it back.  Feels dishonest.

So Dr. Gottfried outlines a sample days menu and describes the basis of her plan.  Imagine by surprise (read a heavy dose of sarcasm there) when I realized that basically she was just saying to go gluten free.  LOL  It was kind of cool to read her explanation though, since it isn't something I've had explained quite this simply before.  She says that "In the last 30 years, wheat has been genetically modified to have a higher gluten content."  The thyroid trouble occurs because "gluten is a sticky wheat protein so similar in shape to thyroid hormone that it can enter and block the body's receptors for thyroid hormone."

She basically says to swap things like sugar, bread, white rice and pasta for brown rice, beans and sweet potatos.  Hmmm, I already have! LOL  So now I stick to the plan and in a few months I will be very curious to see if my thyroid has improved.  I'll keep ya posted!

Guest Blogger - Reynolds

I am a member of the fantastic community of juice nuts at rebootwithjoe.com based on Joe Cross and his experiences as seen on "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead."  My friend Reynolds is the guy that everyone in our group turns to for wisdom and inspiration.  He is in the middle of this same journey that I am on and, like me, feels that nothing in this world is going to offer the things that juice fasting can.  Another friend on the group had had a pretty significant slip-up on day 6 of her first juice fast and wondered if she should just give up and "pig out for a few days" or jump right back into juice fasting or maybe just try to transition onto a healthy "diet" instead of juice fasting.  She got tons of great advice and support but Reynolds words really hit home for many of us.  I asked him if I could post his reply here and he agreed so here it is.  Someone out there needs to hear this.  I just have this feeling.

Heathie: I read your post then went offline to compose a thoughtful response. When I came back to post, Katie had posted her very sage advice gleaned from numerous reboots over the last 6 months where she trimmed over 100 pounds from her frame. My words are very similar to hers, I'm just more long-winded. But the common points on which we both touch, we hope resonate with you. Here is mine:

ROFL..... Heathie your number three, "pig out a few days and then start back?" had me splitting my side. You probably don't get it but Natalie, Katie and Jana do for sure.

You are likely saying, "but I wasn't trying to be funny." Exactly! You were asking the SAME question every Fattie asks themselves when they get a mouthful of mud... "so do I just go back to being who I was for all those years?" Every single one of us in this forum have had huge doubts when we stumbled and we asked that same question.

Here is the whole enchilada wrapped up in a long thought :

All fat people got that way for a reason, maybe three. Once fat, we had family, friends and society send us mixed messages about our rising weight. At some point we became obese, and while we learned a host of excuses to push back anyone who cautioned or criticized us, we never managed to get around to accepting responsibility for STAYING fat. It is one thing to get fat over our teenage and young adult years, but it is another thing to keep gaining in our twenties, thirties and forties. Jana, Natslie, Katie and I are all near or above 50. Sure, we'd tried to lose weight every year or two. But we never found a way to get it off and keep it off. Until we ran into Joe Cross and juice fasting.

Heathie, what happens on a JF is a fundamental change in the mind. It doesn't come with most any other weight reduction plan. During a prolonged JF the mind is allowed, yes even forced, to put some distance between food and ourselves. Not having reason to be so intimate with chewed foods for a period of time allows us to reduce, and even remove, the emotional bonds that exist between EVERY Fattie and food. Finally, the stranglehold food has had on us is broken, literally, for the first time. It is not a permanent break up, necessarily, and yes that is the challenge of every Fattie that has gone through an extended JF must deal with.

I can't tell you how many days you have to be on a JF (10-45?) before the brain makes the switch and the mind sees things like it has NEVER seen them before. That change has as many looks as there are people doing a JF. But most JFers come to the realization that they have been lied to by the commercial food companies, but worse they've been egregiously lying to themselves as well.

During the JF the combination of detoxing, losing lots of weight and stepping back some distance from food synergizes together to give the person a birdseye view of food, addiction, compulsion, cravings and binging. I guess it is akin to seeing a ghost or Bigfoot. -- you might later question what you saw, but at the time you were unmistaken in what you saw. It is that pronounced of an awakening. The trick is to live out what we know. But we have 10-20-30 years of bad habits and only days/weeks/months at having a deep appreciation of vegetables and juicing.

So it is hard at first to win every single fight with our compulsive/addictive self. We'll lose once a day, then once every third day, then once every week, until finally ... finally the body relents and goes along with what the mind has been saying! Then, the struggle is cut to a fraction and the person is "over the hump." Will he or she struggle occasionally? Most certainly. But the struggle isn't at 10:42am, 2:39pm, 6:05pm, 8:47pm -- it is once every week or so.

The addiction is broken, but no immunity is created or a magic shield thrown up around the person. The lust of the eye is still there. The difference is that the new mind sees food differently. It no longer is a surrogate lover as it was. Now it is something to use as needed to meet a basic nutritional need. Sure, enjoying food is fine, but seeking pleasure from food no longer controls your every chewing decision. Most critical for the typical JFer out living in the chewing world again is the ability to master perceptions of food and thereby strictly controlling what goes in the body. There is no longer a free-for-all where just anything goes. We cant kid ourselves anymore. When eating again, every meal is a considered decision. Do want me to say that again? Every meal is a considered decision.

So why this loooong post? Well, what I'm telling you is this, it is so US. So fattie, to flop off the horse and then say, "oh what the hell, I think I'll just go eat a pan of peach cobbler." That is what fatties do routinely.

But in the near future, maybe within only a week or two, you too will recoil from the thought of going and pigging out with every stumble. Soon, you'll want to flee from pig outs as you will see them for what they are -- compulsive , uncontrolled bouts of mania. Yep, as part of JFing the mind changes its perceptions and with the changed perceptions comes a changed behavior. But! It is possible to slide back into the abyss, so vigilance is required for a long time, usually for more than a year.

Have you ever talked with someone that has climbed a massive peak like Kilimanjaro or Denali? Invariably they will mention that besides being staggeringly difficult dealing with all the adversities, it was a very specific system to summit and return to base camp safe. Freelancing was tantamount to death. The many that had gone before had spelled out all the problems and obstacles threatening each climber. While only thousands had done it before, nevertheless all the perils, risks, pitfalls and dilemmas any climber could face were very well articulated and defined by previous climbers writing about their experience.

So it is with a JF. There are no new wrinkles to be discovered by a new JFer. The struggles are all well known and written about here and in many blogs. It is important to know that what each of us are going through on our JF, is completely commonplace. It is predictable! Really!

Oh, not everyone has the exact same issues of headaches and diarrhea, or like. But your weaknesses, cravings, panics, listlessness and other symptoms experienced in your JF are the same ones the rest of us have experienced. Promise! So you see where I'm going with this -- learn from climbers that have summitted and come down to tell about it. Don't think for an instant that you , or me, or Natalie, or Katie, or Jana or Danielle -- can beat the established path that has been blazed ahead of us. We simply can't do it. Knowing the regimen and then sticking to it is imperative. We just aren't smart enough to find a new, better route up the mountain. Stick to the known, proven routes. Going rogue has bad consequences.

So what! You fell off the horse! You did it. Now that is history. Are you going to live in that momentary failure or instead jump back on the horse and ride. I hope you choose the latter, and choose it immediately.

Heathie, you have inside you a champion. But you'll have to find that champion. Usually the champion doesn't show up in the first couple of days as that time is so full of confusion, angst and flailing about.

But she will show up if you stay on the horse. But, before she does, it seems like you are about to expire. The body throws a fit, and then capitulates finally in day 4, 5 or 6. This gets lots easier. We are sure rooting for you and want you to ride with us on our journey to get healthy and lose weight. We hereby grant you a full absolution of your face plant! Now c'mon, go with us. You can only fail if you quit. So don't quit! :)

- See more at: http://community.rebootwithjoe.com/discussions/topic/100-lbs-or-more-starting-a-9113-30-day-reboot?p=83#sthash.AEETWGPg.dpuf

My Personal Dialogue

I belong to several wonderful and amazing groups who are committed to the same path that I have, more or less.  I also follow every committed juice faster and raw foodist that I can find on youtube.  Lately I have seen a rash of people hitting "bumps in the road."  It always hurts my heart to see/hear someone questioning their own commitment and wondering if they should throw away all they've accomplished because of the slip ups, whether it be the first one or the 101st one.  I have a favorite saying: "You never fail until you quit."  The problem is that when you really screw the pooch and dive headfirst into a mountain of processed or fast food, all your past failures and all the nasty chemicals start whispering to you that you are a failure; that  you "can't do it" and trying to convince yourself to tune those voices out is really hard while you are under that influence.  It's like trying to talk to an alcoholic about AA WHILE they are drunk.  It just doesn't work.

I consider there to be two kinds of slip-ups.  Lets get this straight first.  There are slip-ups and then there is screwing the pooch.  A slip-up is, for example, eating too much of a food that is actually allowed on your plan.  The food is okay but you ate much more of it than planned.   Or perhaps you ate a slice of tomato while on a juice fast.  It isn't going to really mess with your head in a chemical way but it wasn't "The Plan."  Now screwing the pooch is an entirely different thing.  For example, going for a value meal at McDonalds, possibly followed up with a box of donuts or a trip to Braum's for a brownie fudge sundae.  Of course, there are also all the degrees in between.  I have had slip-ups but since I started down this path back in August, I haven't screwed the pooch even once.  Not even close.  I see these people who seem so committed and so strong and who are even having great results slip and sometimes fall altogether.  The ones who just never show back up break my heart.  The ones that get up, dust themselves (and the juicer) off, and trot right back down that path again are heroes.

As I said, I've encountered quite a few of both types of slip-ups, fall-downs and crash and burns lately and it's got me asking myself how have I avoided it?  I have only experienced the milder version of slip-ups and one week of trying to put bread back into my diet and discovering that was a bad idea.  (Previous blog - and for the record, I have taken off the 7 lbs I regained from that little experiment as of today.)  Every healthy thing I have attempted in my entire life, I have screwed the pooch within short order and then I've given up entirely.  Every time and there have been many.  Weight watchers, Nutrisystem, Atkins, South Beach, you name it.  I have been the Crowned Queen of excuses and giving up.  How have I avoided that?

I know this will sound simplistic but it really, really isn't.  I have not screwed any pooches this time for a couple of simple reasons.  This plan, this path is awesome.  That's reason number one.  I don't feel deprived.  I have learned the truth about the caca I was eating before and I really, truly, deeply don't have any interest in putting that junk in my body anymore.  The other reason is a little harder to articulate so bear with me.

I have changed my personal dialogue.  I don't stand in front of a mirror and tell myself I'm thin and healthy and becoming more successful every day.  I have literally internalized and come to believe different things about myself.  I think of myself as someone who has conquered a huge slavering beast and come out of it with super powers, because I did.  I think of myself as someone who loves all those beautiful rainbow treats in the produce section, because I am.  I think of myself who has the number of the food industry liars and the FDA and the Dept of Ag liars and doesn't fall for their bs anymore.  I'm smarter than that.  I think of myself as someone who sets a good example for her family and friends because I AM.  And I think of myself as someone who is clearly losing weight and becoming healthier and stronger every day Because. I. Am.

I am human and, let's face it, the holidays are approaching like a locomotive.  I was concerned that the first big test would be all the masses of Halloween candy that appeared a couple of weeks ago.  But honest to goodness, it just isn't even on my radar.  Not even when a friend holds out a big basket of it and says, "have a piece!"  I mean it sincerely when I say it isn't even difficult to say, "No thanks."  If I ever, finally, face that day, that situation, that I can't say no to and I experience a true Screw-the-pooch moment, I am confident that I will have the strength to turn right back down my chosen path.  But I reject the conventional wisdom that says that day is inevitable.

The Gluten Question

Well, for me at least, the question is settled. A few months ago, after some research and reading*, I decided to try eliminating gluten for a couple of weeks to see if it helped with how horrible I felt back then. It did seem to help and I was pretty much convinced that I was one of the unlucky few to have significant problems with modern wheat gluten. I was trying to keep it out of my diet as much as possible. 

Fast forward to October. After juice fasting for several weeks and then combining plant-based clean eating with juice, I was completely gluten free. And if you've read any of my blogs, you know I was feeling fantastic. My experiment during the Spring was done when my diet overall was a mess. I noticed a reduction in joint pain and stomach pain and brain-fog but any improvement was just a matter of degree. I had come to think that was all I could ever expect from anything so that was good with me. Well now, I know that I don't have to settle for a few degrees better; I can demand GREAT! So I decided to redo the gluten experiment. 

This past week, I reintroduced very healthy, limited portions of sprouted, whole-grain bread back into my diet. For the first time since I began my juice fast, I have had stomach pain, brain-fog and aching joints. Also (coincidence maybe? I kinda doubt it....) the first week I haven't lost a single pound. So that's enough proof for me to make a decision. FOR ME, the gluten question is resolved. No gluten for me. I don't settle for better any more. I want to keep feeling fantastic. I am not saying that everyone should eliminate gluten, but I would recommend that if you have a pretty healthy diet and are still struggling with weight loss and/or digestive issues, joint pain, brain fog, fatigue, etc, it might be worth it to at least try a couple of weeks without it and then put it back into your diet to see if it affects symptoms. 

*Wheat Belly by William Davis is a good laymans introduction to the issue but I always advocate looking up the research for yourself if you can.  The wheat we are sold today is NOT the same as the wheat our ancestors ate.  That much is fact.  You can have all the opinions your little heart desires but you can't have your own set of facts.  Wheat today barely resembles the wheat from even 100 short years ago.  If GMOs aren't remotely disturbing to you then...  wake up.

Just One Bite?

If you have tried a few (or many) diets like I have, you have at some point encountered a certain school of thought that has been on my mind a lot lately.  For example, there is currently a weight watchers commercial where the lovely, thin woman says she WILL sometimes have a cupcake, just not the whole cake.  Many diet books/gurus will tell you that you should not eliminate any particular food.  "Don't tell yourself you can never again eat cookie cake because then you won't want to stick to it."  Right?  You follow me?  That is a very common belief.  If you try to think you can never have this or that special yummy that you love then you'll quit because you can't face life without pizza, or Snickers or whatever.

I understand where this train of thought comes from.  I do.  And I understand that if we talk in terms that are super rigid and unforgiving, some people won't ever start and others won't last long.  Many believe that they are setting themselves up to fail if they don't allow for the occasional indulgence.  I'm not saying that we should never indulge in something diet-naughty ever again.  I'm not saying I won't ever indulge again.  I AM saying that my idea of what is an indulgence has changed.  And I think that for long-term success and happiness in this new lifestyle, that is what has to happen.  And after talking to many, many juicers and recently converted vegans and raw-foodists, etc, that can and WILL happen if you give yourself half a chance.  Pretty much everyone says the same thing, "My taste buds really HAVE changed!" And we all say it with the same tone of wonder and disbelief in our voices and on our faces.  Lets face it, for those of us weighing in the 300s and 400s, we didn't get there by having an appetite for loads of raw veggies.  Those were the things we didn't mind having a bit of with our meat and butter laden mashed potatos and before our cupcake... or whole cake.

I don't need people telling me that it's okay to have a cupcake.  I got to 340 lbs telling myself that.  If I eat really healthy food 90% of the time, then a cupcake won't hurt anything, right?  Well, of course it won't.  But here's the problem: nobody who has gotten to be fat, sick and nearly dead (thank you Joe Cross;o)  has the ability to eat "healthy" by conventional wisdom standards and then occasionally treat themselves with a frigging cupcake.  Truth.  I know I'll take some heat for this view but it's truth and sometimes truth hurts.  If we COULD do that, don't you think we would have already?  Would you tell someone who is a few months after having their last cigarette that just one cigarette won't hurt. It'll make you feel like you can keep going!  Hello Ms Alcoholic who spent a couple years in jail for DUI and got sober 6 months ago, have a drink.  Just one won't hurt anyone and it'll make you feel like you can stick it out longer.  IT'S THE SAME.  IT'S THE SAME. IT'S THE SAME!!!!!!!

If I could have done this the "conventional wisdom" route, I certainly already would have.  Certainly tried often enough.  I tried with Weight Watchers, I tried with Atkins, I tried with tracking and balancing the key nutrients on Sparkpeople (NOT dissing Sparkpeope - it is a FANTASTIC tool/resource that I use every day) and I tried Nutrisystems where they sent me prepackaged meals... including ittle-bitty "healthy" cupcakes.  I tried cabbage soup and some email "pre-surgery" diet that involved lots of tunafish and bananas.  I lost weight with every single plan I tried.  And then I gained weight.  I didn't throw my hands up and just give up and turn around and start going to McDonalds again.  (At least usually I didn't... there were times.)  Usually, it happened something like this:  

Day 12:  I think I'm really going to have to have a little treat at the birthday party or I'll feel too deprived and give up.  And of course, I can't turn down Aunt Mary's special recipe macaroni and cheese or I'll hurt her feelings.

Day 13:  I really shouldn't have had that 3rd piece of cake.  I'll be super, extra good the rest of this week.

Day 14: One little piece of pizza isn't so bad.  I'll eat just salad for supper.

Day 15: What do you mean I gained a pound?!  I have to get down to business and stick to the plan perfectly this week.  Right after I pout with this Sonic meal that I really can't avoid because I don't have time to do anything else today because of x, y and z.

Fast forward to Day 21 by which time I have gradually phased myself right back into eating whatever falls into my hands the easiest.  

Here's the thing, the one thing, the MAIN thing.  We super-fatties don't do Just One Bite.  We don't even usually do Just One Piece.  We might stick to just one at the party (because we fatties aren't supposed to let anyone else see us eat) but then when we get home, we'll have another and usually another.   We "just one piece" ourselves into guilt, shame, rage and yet another 25 or 50 or 80 lbs by that time next year.  And it isn't lack of willpower or lack of character or pure-dee old gluttony; it's addiction.  Addictive substances are added to almost everything the modern American eats.  Yes, even those tasty little weight-watcher's entrees.  It is also a big heaping dose of misinformation.  The people we should be able to trust to tell us what we need to know to feed our families and ourselves in a healthy manner, you know who I mean, the FDA and the Department of Agriculture etc, they lie.  They pander to the money and they lie to us.  Straight up.  

So is it hopeless then?  Do we accept that we can't moderate our own eating.  Fall into the shame and blame trap?  Fail to even try because life is no fun without sugar and deep-fat fried everything? No because we can CHANGE what we crave.  We CAN change what constitutes an indulgence for us.  For real.  I'm not talking about pasting on a smile and pretending that we are just loving having this salad at Olive Garden while the family all eat lasagna and eggplant parmesan.  I'm talking about really, for real finding ourselves loving the taste of clean, fresh, whole, veggies that are not slathered in butter or cheese sauce.  Feeling that we have really treated ourselves to a splurge when we have banana/berry sorbet from our blender.  There really IS a magic pill.  Go cold-turkey on EVERYTHING processed, packaged and made by man for a while.  Become a strict whole food junkie for just a while.  Or do what I did, watch Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead and then watch Forks Over Knives and then do a juice fast.  After just a week on nothing but fresh-made veggie/fruit juice, I stopped craving things.  After a couple of weeks on juice, I literally found the taste thought of over-processed junk posing as food (like those little frozen weight watchers dinners and cupcakes) repulsive.  And after several weeks of an almost exclusively juice diet, as we test the waters of what foods work for us and figuring out what we actually like now, we really truly don't like the taste of the same crap that we used to feed on all the time.  When my grandkids were over the other day, their mama brought some food with them since they surely couldn't survive the day on just fruits and veggies.  Harmoni (my 17 year old) and I tasted one of the "chicken strips."  I looked at her and she said to me, "I can't believe that used to be chicken to me.  That's disgusting."  And today, she tasted a little taste of the kind of peanut butter we used to buy and said that it didn't taste good... in fact, it didn't taste like peanuts!  (We use Smuckers Natural peanut butter now.  It's the best stuff!  Nothing in there but peanuts.)  We have found that salad actually tastes really good with some herbs and a tiny bit of vinaigrette on it.  We really don't have to smother it in ranch dressing.  (Read the ingredients on that little bundle of joy sometime.  Ugh!)

So, the point of this not-so-short rant is that, yes, I am pretty hard line.  No I'm not okay with the idea of a bit of birthday cake to show solidarity.  No, I'm not going to pretend it's okay if I ever DO slip up and eat something disgusting.  It's not okay.  I'm not going to beat myself up and dwell on it but I'm not going to say it's okay and I'm certainly not going to plan ahead to do it.  People don't regain all the weight they lose on any eating plan by just turning right around and heading back the way they came, they turn around little by little by little.  They turn around by taking just one bite.  And then a few more.  We all have choices in life.  Every day I make the choice to ONLY eat things my body truly needs.  Think about that for a minute.  How much of what you eat does your body truly need? Answer: Very. Damn. Little.  Every day I make the choice to find comfort, entertainment and pleasure in other ways.  It doesn't have to be through my food.  It sounds so trite to say that feeling this healthy is better than how any food out there tastes.  What's that saying?  Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.  Well, there sure as heck isn't anything that tastes as good as healthy and energetic and getting thinner every day feels.  Nothing.  And I refuse to just-one-bite myself back into the trance of processed, poisonous, addictive crap that 99% of people think is food.  News flash: McNuggets aren't food.  Food is the carrier of the nutrients our body needs into our system.  McNuggets and Totinos pizza and Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup carry a few nutrients on the back of literal poison.  Addictive poison.  I'm over it.

This:

Or this:

My Motivation? It Couldn't Be Simpler.

My 5% Challenge team gave an assignment to write out our motivation for losing weight. Mine is, on the surface, a variation on the same theme as many other people. Health, legacy and looks. In that order. I used to care a lot more about the looks aspect and I still care but not NEARLY as much. I used to say that losing weight for my health was important but inside, I just wanted to look good and not be ashamed to be seen in a pair of shorts. I didn't want to look like a supermodel but I wanted to feel confident in my own skin. Nowadays, I tell people I am motivated by how my girls are learning such healthy habits now and how much more energy I have and (a big one for me) by my desire to be a horsewoman again. Oh man, I can't tell you how much I miss making horses a huge part of my life. But in reality it is much, much simpler. 

After facing life as a near recluse and very nearly bedfast, having to have other people take care of my needs, my home, my chores, etc, I have a very different perspective. When I say the number one thing is to regain my health, you can bank that. I had given up on any hope of getting much enjoyment out of life any more. I was hoping I would have a massive coronary so that my family (and I ) wouldn't have to suffer through years of my gradual decline. I felt that I was a very poor example to my teenagers of how to live a life. I wasn't able to be the kind of grandma that I wanted to be so I pretty much avoided spending more than an hour or so at a time with my grandkids. I had accepted that the "fun" portion of the program was over and I didn't particularly want to hang in there for the sad ending. I've never been into sad endings. 

When I watched the videos that lit that flame of hope once again in my heart, I didn't hesitate. I KNEW it was my last chance. I knew that this was what God wanted, no expected, from me so I did it. The change has been so dramatic, so fast and so unquestionable that there is just no turning back for me. Eating healthy, whole, clean foods and juicing fresh veggies in order to flood my body with the nutrients it has been longing for is the only option for me. 

People ask me how I can avoid my trigger foods or temptation or whatever and they don't understand when I tell them it just isn't an option any more. They think, "Oh sure, easier said than done." But it is easily done now. Yes, I meant what I said; it is EASILY done now. I have faced situations where huge triggers from my old life were offered to me on a platter and I was looked at askance for refusing. Was it hard to say no? Do I deserve a medal for having the courage to look that old favorite straight in the eye and then walk away? NO. Because it was EASY! Would it be hard for me to say no to Meth? Or crack? Or heroin? NO. I don't put poison in my body no matter how much fun someone tells me it is because I value my health, my integrity and my future much more than any momentary pleasure. Yes. It really is like that for me now. I can't say that I will never feel that pull again. Forever is a long time and it is asking for trouble to say never. But for now, by the grace of God, it is easy. I can walk on my own and I can swim and I HAVE NO PAIN. So I can eat a big beautiful salad or a bowl of yummy, homemade veggie soup and keep feeling like I have a future or I can eat a hamburger and fries and a cookie and climb back into my deathbed. 

So what is my motivation for sticking to the program? It's pretty simple when you boil it down. I. Want. To. Live.